just wants to sink its mouth on your breasts.
Get in line, mimic.
My prescription stopped changing in my late 20s.
I'm almost 40 so I know that time is coming to an end.
I like reminding my single friends that 73% of Americans are considered overweight. 41% are obese.
A shocking amount of my male friends are overweight or obese and refuse to date overweight women.
Not my menstrual cup!
The author's barely disguised fetish strikes again!
They already exist? I've never heard of them.
The expression on the security guard on the right is hilarious to me.
We don't know how long they've been together.
I would not want my first meeting with someone's mother to be on their deathbed. And as a grown woman, I wouldn't want my son's new piece of ass at my deathbed, either.
Hey I'm am Xennial and I'm also allergic to bananas!
Someone should do a study.
My wifi is Roll for Perception. My laptop is Roll Iniative.
Because the laptop is a mimic. If you can see it, you're in biting distance.
You all laugh, but this is a rare artifact known only to those of us allergic to corn.
This is the corny hand grenade of Antioch, and if you throw it at a person allergic to corn, we simply vanish from this plane.
Jokes on you tho. If you do that, you'll miss out on my killer loot.
This is hilarious because when my Dad was alive, a long pause like that usually meant he completely agreed but felt like a father shouldn't say that.