Antiwork

Alternative title: How to be the best Tool, and still be completely disposable!

If by 'wisdom' you mean 'cancer'.

As long as my boss is happy and satisfied, I don't give a shit. I usually work 8 hours on Monday, pretend I'm working the entire week and chill from Tuesday to Friday

Having a work ethic is a fine thing. Just don't let sleazy employers take advantage of it, because you'll get nothing in return.

Everybody is down to work. They just aren't little bitches who say thank you when you abuse them.

Repeatedly devalue workers through layoffs and never promoting

Workers give up trying to climb the corporate ladder and do the bare minimum

surprised pikachu

Every damn job where I tried to do this did not end well for me. I got treated like absolute shit and the people who abused me were praised for their actions even when they got fired after I was for trying to do the same shit to other people. It brought only harm to me and did not even benefit my employers all that much.

This advice makes you an exploitable schmuck and they will do that simply because they can.

So you turn on the lights, get your coffee and read your newspaper/browse your phone until someone else is actually there.

Then you do the same thing once you are the only person left.

Congratulations. Flipping on and off lightswitches is the shittiest metric a company can seek and is evidence of bad management.

This made me far more angry than your frying pan, just gotta say.

I have a work ethic. My work ethic is to be paid fairly for my labor.

Work ethic never went out of fashion. Many, many people work very hard everyday. Always have. Work is a part of life, always has been, always will be. It's the incentives that are the problem. Paying people just enough (or not enough, in many cases) to just keep their heads above water, for taking on more and more work, so that owners, investors, and executives can make ever increasing profits, just doesn't motivate people to work very hard. Much of the hard work in the current system is motivated by fear. That is not positive or sustainable.

No, no, this is good advice, actually. I mean, it is a pain to go to the office twice, but flipping a switch only takes seconds, and you have the rest of the day to fuck around.

"Should we promote Bob?"

"Hell no, he's the only one here who does any work! We need him right where he is!"

the only people who want to put in longer hours at the office have absolutely nothing to go home to.

they should be pitied instead of being vilified. drop them a "get well soon" message in social media should you encounter them.

That's a year old article by a bootlicker

Shit when im the first one in, i leave the lights off. Then i get mad at the person who eventually turns them on. If i have to be in that early, i dont also want to be miserable from the bright lights

I've learned to be the one to turn the lights off. It pisses the boss off but ensures everyone knows the shift is over

Fuck you. Pay me.

If I turned the office lights off at the end of my workday, it'll just annoy the people who are still working. 🤷🏻‍♂️

If you pride yourself on being a hard worker just know that everyone else is in a group chat without you.

So if the same person is opening and closing, what is everyone else doing? If you're going to saddle one employee with an important duty, you better have adequate compensation and opportunities.

So, become the office janitor?

Hahahaha talk about corporate propaganda. I feel sorry for the poor schlub that reads this and is like "yeah, I'm gonna do that".

I turn the lights on in the morning and make coffee. Because I'm the only one that knows how to make coffee that doesn't taste like dirty water. Has nothing to do with work ethic and everything to do with coffee.

If I saw one of my employees being the first one in the office turning on the lights as well as the last one turning them off, I'd see that as a problem.

I'd talk to that worker and first ask why they were doing this as I'd be concerned that they may be having trouble at home (and were using work as an escape). I'd want to find out if there was anything they needed to help their home situation. When you manage people, their home problems become your problems. The corollary to this is that a solution for a personal home problem can become a solution to a workplace problem. I had one worker that had difficulty at work because they didn't have working laundry facilities which affected them wearing presentable clothing at work. I bought them a new laundry appliance for $500 and had it delivered. After that they were always dressed presentably at work. This was a very good worker otherwise, and this fixed the work problem as well as helped them at home in their personal life.

If they communicated they believed the "first in, last out" was their understanding of the work expectation, I'd correct them on that immediately. One of my favorite phrases to use at work are "There are days I might have to ask you to stay later. This is not that day. There's nothing urgent that can't wait for tomorrow. Go home early." (these are salary folks, so they're not losing money by leaving early).

If they communicated they were overworked, I'd work with them on the tasks to make sure they were only getting assigned a reasonable workload. This may mean hiring another worker, or eliminating tasks that don't produce a meaningful result to the company to make sure the workload would be reasonable.

Requiring your workers to be "butts in seats" (mine are WFH anyway) simply to be tick a box is the fastest way to lose your best people as it is disrespectful of their skills and their effort. Further, well rested workers (mentally and physically) perform far better than exhausted and stressed ones.

End of year performance review.

“We think your performance this year has been ok. Not great, not bad, just ok. We can’t justify a bonus for you this year with senior management.”

“But I am always the last one out every night and have been nearly all year.”

“Really, I wouldn’t know. I never stick around that late. Now that reminds me, there were those two days last month where you were seen leaving early. We don’t appreciate that lack of work ethic at this company.”

“It was because I had stayed back late the previous days!”

I managed an auto parts warehouse with a small fleet of delivery drivers, I was the one with the code to the alarm and they keys to everything. Sometimes if I had trouble sleeping or was a bit hungover from imbibing too much I’d sleep in and roll up to the shop around 9-10 instead of 7. Not a single one of my employees ever had an issue with starting the day later and I didn’t care about them leaving early to pick up kids or whatever. Long as you show up and shit gets done I’m putting the same hours on all your paychecks anyways

Yes! Pretend that you feel like this but do your own thing man. Show up to work excited but only do what you’re paid for or what they deserve.

You know thw thing is all the tales of really successful people arent about going to the office early and grinding down some stupid task a superior gave you but about following your dreams and putting effort into those. Quitting your job and taking out a loan to build a racecar or start helping people with pc repair or whatever your dream is, is better advice than putting any effort into something you hate. Its not work ethic but being a mindless slave.

Not just on the Americas side of the pond, apparently.

I'm applying for dozens and dozens of jobs right now in the UK, so I expect to get plenty of rejection emails, but today, Monday, two days before Christmas, 11 rejection emails so far, which is a record (I'm not upset, I am aware I will get far more rejections than interviews). Obviously people are working like crazy to get everything done right before Christmas, but I thought at least the UK was more relaxed on this stuff. You really couldn't wait until January to send out rejection emails? Gotta grind right up to Christmas?