if you can't handle the wars stop STARTING THEM mfs playing with Total War diplomatic skills
the_dunk_tank
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I could win a 7 front war in Total War easy π
*Playing with Sid Myer's Gandhi AI
A lot of grand strategy games, the power in play is to do a lot of things that irk your target until they declare war, and thus you avoid any of the diplomatic penalties of being the aggressor. They don't simulate real world politics well at all
Missing a front
I know Australia had a gameplan in place since WWII to retreat and abandon half the country. Not sure how that would play out here.
The "Brisbane Line"? What was the deal with that?
No idea. I only learned about it when listening to Yahtzee's Let's Plays several years ago.
New Zealand was like βWeβre sick and tired of your sheep jokes, Australia.β
The North Island and South Island have negotiated a tense ceasefire and formed a united front after agreeing that the inter-Kiwi conflict is a less pressing matter than the end of Australian oppression
If you're facing a one-front war, you have justification for your defense. If you're facing a two-front war, either you started some shit or you got tag-teamed by your neighbors, so a toss up whether or not you deserved it.
If you're facing a seven-front war, it is totally and unequivocally your fault. There has never been a country minding its own business that gets dogpiled to that degree in the modern era.
Counterpoint: like a dozen different countries invaded Russia during the Russian Civil War.
*reactions to revolutions that threaten the entire current global order right in the backyard of the major empires not included
Counter Counterpoint: the Russian civil war was not in the modern era
Depends on where you put the start of the "modern era," really. By some definitions, it began about 500 years ago.
Fair; I'd not realized it was so contentious a period to classify
I have seen it as 1871 to 1945, but I don't remember the context for it
MY country? I can't afford a house and none of my politicians would rather I stay alive. I'd help translate English for the invaders and teach them grappling if they need it. At this point you'd get a stronger reaction if you told me 7 countries were out to attack the strawhat pirates.
No one is invading israel, don't fall for that.
This feels like a pretty literal recreation of this old wwii poster, itll tug on the faint memories of the the target audience (fb boomers)
content warning orientalist racist shit
(In order) Indonesia, Malaysia, Brunei, Papua New Guinea, Micronesia (or maybe more specifically the Soloman Islands), Fiji and the cherry on top of this shit sundae New Zealand. Half of these are Muslim majority countries. IMAGINE
I notice Singapore is excluded which is fucking hilarious considering that it's the only country in this region that has an actual history of espionage against Australia.
That is indeed the Solomon Islands, which are a part of Melanesia, not Micronesia.
Ah whoops thanks for the correction
IMAGINE IF IT WERE YOUR COUNTRY.
Luckily, my country is , you can thank me now
I'm trying to imagine a scenario where Norway would be in a seven-ish-front war, but the only scenarios I can imagine are:
Scenario 1: Norway becomes a socialist state, and so we basically just get Operation Urgent Fury 2, and there's not much more to say about it.
Scenario 2: There is an absolutely bizarre situation involving a three-way dispute of Orkney going hot, a fascist Sweden going irredentist, and a fascist Finland trying to establish a Turanist Co-Prosperity Sphere, and then other countries join in a "Scramble for Norway" in a "first as tragedy, then as farce" sort of way, using justifications like "peacekeeping" or "protecting their citizens abroad" or whatever else β the imperial core essentially cannibalizing itself as the periphery successfully resists the core's parasitism.
Scenario 3: The Second World War ended with the Nazis somehow negotiating with the Western powers to remain in power in Germany, Denmark, and Norway as a bulwark against the spread of communism. Nazi rule would inevitably collapse in Germany and Denmark at most a few decades later, leaving Norway as basically the German Nazis' Taiwan. When the "Greater German Reich" then inevitably goes rogue again, we basically just see a tragedy-then-farce sorta-repeat of WWII as it actually happened, except this time Berlin is substituted for Nordstern City.
Edit: Well, really, nothing says Norway couldn't become a bizarrely expansionist rogue state without being a rump of Nazi Germany. I feel like this wouldn't be any more farfetched than imagining this happening to Sweden and Finland.
Maybe Australia shouldn't have been indiscriminately bombing New Zealand then
Honestly it's probably only a matter lf days before I see this posted up on a wall near me. The local Zionists go sticker happy over the weekend
Fuck Australia
Imagine if it were your ~~country~~ settler colony
I would cheer and volunteer to some fifth column-type of effort to open up an eighth front internally.
our flag would be Matt's face in joker makeup.
The last time my country got attacked on multiple fronts they officially called it the German Greater Reich, so the Israel comparison is not as hard to imagine as you might think...
Death to Australia, Death to America, and Death to the West!
I worry that the Royal Brunei Armed Forces may have bitten off more than they can chew by deciding to conquer all of northern Australia. Still, best of luck to them!
What seven fronts does Israel count... Gaza, Lebanon, Iran, Yeman... West bank?... Iraq?
I had an idea for a video game, imagine a spiritual reincarnation of Red Alert 2, except instead of the USSR invading the US, China invades Australia. This map gives me good vibes.
Based. Yes please, also the other genocidal Anglo-settler colonies
I'm imagining it was my country as one of the 7 nations
Tie me to a missile to Sydney, im ready