Autism

I'm not diagnosed, only lately suspecting, but well, one experience that stuck with me, was on a communications training at my workplace, which is an IT company, so the participants were a whole sack of nerds.

The trainer gave us instructions to stand in a line next to each other, she'd read forms of communication and we should take a step forward, if we did not like that form of communcation.

So, "e-mail" → 3 people take a step forward,
"phone call" → 7 people take a step forward etc..

At the end of it, I turned around to see where the others ended up and realized I had walked almost twice as far as everyone else. And I felt like I was rather conservative about it, too...

When I make a drink or food in the kitchen, I try to do so as physically economically as possible/with the minimum amount of moves around the kitchen. It's like a weird food-prep-tai-chi nonsense I do!

My whole life, I have lived by adhering to rules and protocols. Nearly everything I do is based on a decision flow chart that follows internal protocols I have developed throughout my life that I consciously think about when making decisions and then, of course, lessons learned after the event. When I'm alone, I explain these processes out loud to my imaginary audience.

There are only 2 areas in which I do not do this: art and sex. For some reason, in those two areas, I just disconnect and go with feeling. It's like I'm not even thinking. However, everything else is a consciously thought out process.

When someone pointed out that I had made the same meal for dinner for most of my meals every week, for 4 months.

When work is slow and stable I'm bored out of my fuckin mind but when shit hits the fan and I've got minimal staffing I can cover 4 stations at once faster than most people could cover 1

Just reorganized my collection of 18092 PDF files by renaming them based on 12-word criteria pattern. Which is funny, since the number of files corresponds with the majority of the registration number of USCSS Nostromo.

All done by hand.

Lazy Saturday. Depending on the timezone, also Friday and Sunday.

I don't understand why people with autistic kids describe their kids needs as special. These needs are all completely normal. There must be some misunderstanding.

...oh

I have 3 projects at work, a project a home, plus chores, and a routine for feeding the animals and keeping the house clean, which I can't adhere to, so lump them in as chores, and I have to talk with friends regularly about twice a week, assuming I'm not overwhelmed and sit in dead silence, and the projects at work overwhelm me, so the project at home suffers, which overwhelms me, so chores don't get done, and that overwhelms me, and I talk to friends, but they can tell I'm overwhelmed and they ask me what's wrong, which overwhelms me, so I sit in front of YouTube and get high.

I just started on my meds a week ago. Here's hoping.

I like to recite grammar rules or language facts to myself when I'm feeling stressed out, almost like a form of meditation.

I got super excited when I discovered we had a whole department at work dedicated to maintaining all the back end customer/vendor/product data in our systems.

Now I'm in it, and I love it so much.

In the last few years I started to describe myself as an introvert-extrovert with a social battery.

Behold my bewilderment when I found out it's masked auDHD.

I recently found out that it's not common to always buy the same brand of generic food types like apple juice, fish fingers, cereal,...

Define "late"

"..and that was so annoying, like, why are they arguing with my diagnosis"

"Huh. I suppose I'm still arguing with mine"

Whenever I get stressed I find something to alphabetize.