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Parenthood failure (lemmy.world)
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[-] NONE_dc@lemmy.world 212 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"Okay honey, it's really cool that you're Gay and all. But could you, like... Go back in the closet and come out again? It's for something that's very important to me" 🥺

[-] MsPenguinette@lemmy.world 163 points 1 month ago

This man will never take a shower in peace without being haunted by this memory

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 30 points 1 month ago

You mean “shake a tower”. 🤦‍♂️

[-] Hobthrob@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Is that an euphemisms for masturbation?

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

No. It’s a dad way of saying take a shower, by switching the first two letters of each word.

Edit: another one is the fit has hit the shan, which is a less vulgar way of saying the shit has hit the fan.

[-] Hobthrob@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Guess I still need to work on my own dad jokes, as mine apparently went "whoosh" right there.

[-] Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

It will be on his tombstone.

[-] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 57 points 1 month ago

Homie has the opportunity to ascend to a higher plane of dadhood and completly blew it

[-] CaptDust@sh.itjust.works 43 points 1 month ago

You should turn in the dad card immediately, the offices are open 9-3. The regulations were clearly defined - no exceptions.

[-] RandomStickman@fedia.io 28 points 1 month ago

Probably need to buy a few pairs of New Balance and khakis for redemption

"You are a father but we do not grant you the rank of 'Dad'."

[-] Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca 24 points 1 month ago

Devastating.

[-] penquin@lemm.ee 17 points 1 month ago

I'm actually mad about it now. Fucking wasted it, man :/

[-] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 month ago

gonna have to take your dad classes again

[-] troglodytis@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago

Are you sure you're even her dad?

[-] gmtom@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Man needs a paternity test ASAP

[-] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

Task failed successfully

[-] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 1 month ago

In a similar situation, i just looked at my wife and said "you owe me 5€."

this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2024
948 points (97.7% liked)

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