this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2024
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[–] supafuzz@hexbear.net 106 points 4 months ago (1 children)

the fake hillbilly motherfucker is gonna be one burger down the wrong pipe away from the presidency

we live in the bad timeline but at least it's funny

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)

As president he's gonna have to wear suspenders and snap them anytime he wants to make a point

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[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 77 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Fucking lmao Peter Thiel is one fish delite-related asphyxiation away from the presidency.

[–] newacctidk@hexbear.net 73 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I think the Trillbillies are going to SH themselves

[–] john_browns_beard@hexbear.net 52 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Next episode is going to be a banger

[–] newacctidk@hexbear.net 57 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Tarence has already muted his DMs apparently. lol

[–] john_browns_beard@hexbear.net 23 points 4 months ago
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[–] GVAGUY3@hexbear.net 59 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Negative charisma. Hillbilly Elegy aged like shit (and it already was shit).

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 57 points 4 months ago

I'm surprised by this pick because I think Trump will get annoyed - perhaps very quickly - if Vance gets even a little too much attention. I'm not saying Vance is super charismatic or anything. But Pence was a smart pick for Trump because he was as interesting as a pile of wet paper towels.

[–] CrispyFern@hexbear.net 54 points 4 months ago (5 children)

My sister went to see jd Vance speak at her college and there was going to be a meet and greet thing after the speech with cookies and juice. She ended up having to leave early and when she went to get a cookie she accidentally knocked the whole catering-sized box all over the floor. She tried to help the staff clean them up, but when she tried to throw them away they were like, "what are you doing? Those are still good?" and PUT THE FLOOR COOKIES BACK ON THE TABLE TO BE SERVED!

So I know for a fact that JD Vance has eaten floor cookies.

[–] da_gay_pussy_eatah@hexbear.net 26 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I've also eaten floor cookies, tbf.

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Same. I've eaten a lot of things off the floor.

Most commonly it's floor chips

[–] Black_Mald_Futures@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago

I mean look, it depends on how clean the floor is

[–] Boredom@hexbear.net 17 points 4 months ago

Man of the people tbh, 5 second rule.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 16 points 4 months ago

Your sister is Larry David

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[–] footfaults@hexbear.net 52 points 4 months ago

Elegy yourself and everyone around you

[–] TillieNeuen@hexbear.net 51 points 4 months ago

I hate Peter Thiel so much

[–] MolotovHalfEmpty@hexbear.net 44 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I can see the electoral rationale for this if you consider Vance as a way to try and plug some holes in Trump's public image for the campaign.

His USMC service means Trump can use him to distract from the 'suckers and losers' or lack of support from veterans attack line. Vance's whole hillbilly elegy working class hope shtick (yeah it's bullshit) counters Trump's NYC spoiled billionaire reality. The fact that Vance used to talk mad shit about Trump doesn't just mean that Trump can use him bending the knee as a sign of strength, but Vance can distance himself from those comments, especially after the shooting, and play into the whole unity and calmer rhetoric thing.

Plus I imagine it comes with an absolutely blank cheque from Peter Thiel and a lot more of silicon valley.

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[–] mar_k@hexbear.net 44 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (3 children)

the message of his famous memoir was literally "the working class appalachians i grew up with are loser rednecks who will never amount to anything because they're worthless lazy fucks who blame all their problems on the system." not exaggerating, this is how he talks about his people:

[–] BabyTurtles@hexbear.net 26 points 4 months ago

No wonder Peter Thiel has been jerking him off.

[–] M68040@hexbear.net 20 points 4 months ago

The best thing Hillbilly Elegy did for me was get me into Trillbilly while looking for good critiques afterwards

[–] Black_Mald_Futures@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago

"A naked druggie"

What Ed, do you bathe with your clothes on?

[–] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 38 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I know

ron-sugar-man is the more direct Republican counterpart of

pete-eat

but Vance gives off a very similar "grown in a vat and programmed to acquise to the highest bidder/biggest evil by adopting any affect or positions his ~~owners~~ ~~handlers~~ backers want him to" kind of vibes

[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 39 points 4 months ago (1 children)

It's not even vibes, lol, he's explicitly owned by Peter Thiel.

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 31 points 4 months ago

So independent. Such outsider.

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 37 points 4 months ago (2 children)

JD Vance sounds like a shady car dealership.

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 19 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

He sounds like he's about to sell me a refrigerator

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[–] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 35 points 4 months ago

Better than Flynn imo

[–] plinky@hexbear.net 30 points 4 months ago

blood boy two handshakes away from the presidency big-cool

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 30 points 4 months ago

Peter Thiel is VP. Musk in shambles

Well, at least it was not some freaky, absolutely-unhinged, Neocon, nuclear warmonger (like Nikki Haley, John Bolton, or even Mike Pence).

However, Vance does seem to be quite anti-China. His selection likely represents a growing split within the US ruling class. One faction wants to "destroy Russia first, then attack China" (i.e. the pro-Biden faction). The other faction wants to "attack China now, then destroy Russia" (i.e. the pro-Trump faction). Both factions seek the same goal: US global domination.

Of course, both of these ruling class factions are arrogant, delusional morons. They could not successfully occupy Iraq and Afghanistan without bankrupting the US federal government. They definitely will not be able to defeat China and Russia.

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 23 points 4 months ago

There's two kinds of Terminators

Blue Terminators and Red Terminators

[–] homhom9000@hexbear.net 22 points 4 months ago (1 children)

JD Vance, Vance refrigeration.

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[–] TheLepidopterists@hexbear.net 20 points 4 months ago (5 children)

Is this not going to alienates to his rural working class chud base? Do they not know who JD Vance is? Like is he not broadly known outside of his preferred fanbase and the communists who hate him?

[–] GVAGUY3@hexbear.net 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)

They won't care, but will blame him for Trumps failures

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 15 points 4 months ago

I already do. Fucking JP MorgVance!

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[–] SteamedHamberder@hexbear.net 20 points 4 months ago

Trillbillies Ep. 1 throwback.

[–] Fatdork2@hexbear.net 19 points 4 months ago

I wasn't sure about Trump before, but with this JD VANCE pick he secured my vote. In fact I will vote for him 5 times. Suck it loony liberals!

[–] NapoleonBlownApart@hexbear.net 18 points 4 months ago

Why does the absolutely shittiest thing keep happening?

[–] M68040@hexbear.net 16 points 4 months ago

Oh boy, Thiel acolytes.

[–] FungiDebord@hexbear.net 13 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Shoot out to the poster who prior to midterms was adamant, over a number of posts, that Vance would never win, because he was "too weird." Brother, you do not understand American politics!

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