this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2024
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[–] prex@aussie.zone 56 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] GrymEdm@lemmy.world 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I'm outraged! That lumber supplier clearly plagiarized the title of my self-published autobiography!

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Just one up them and everything will be solved!

[–] GrymEdm@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago

I'll fetch my chapstick.

[–] Meron35@lemmy.world 29 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] Alsjemenou@lemy.nl 5 points 6 months ago

Okay you need to calm down

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 26 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This is absurd. King Henry I didn’t paint his toenails.

[–] GrymEdm@lemmy.world 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I appreciate a good historical joke.

[–] pseudo@jlai.lu 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Me too but I lack knowledge in history. Care to explain it to me?

[–] GrymEdm@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago (2 children)

The legend is that a foot is actually based of the length of King Henry I's foot. "Imagine two neighbouring farmers, one buying a field from another, one with huge feet, one with tiny. Each measures the field in feet, but one says the footage is less because he’s got a bigger footprint, and therefore he argues a lower price. It’s a recipe for a mighty mediaeval punchup. So Henry proffered his own royal foot, it’s said. Thus, a foot became 12 inches."

[–] flicker@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You know what they say about foot size.

(You're welcome in advance, whoever I set this up for.)

[–] OrnateLuna@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It determines how easy it is for you to find fitting shoes

[–] flicker@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago

This is exactly what I was hoping for! Thanks!

[–] pseudo@jlai.lu 1 points 6 months ago
[–] chetradley@lemmy.world 24 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

Sure! I'll need to wear the right shoes to make sure each step equals a foot though.

[–] GrymEdm@lemmy.world 16 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

The one that's going to slowly escalate towards incredible pleasure is clearly superior.

spoilerThere's very little as satisfying as slipping into a newly tailored suit and looking amazing. Plus it's nice to be cared for by an attentive professional like a tailor perfecting your clothing. No kink-shaming here, but I'll pass on getting stepped on.

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 6 points 6 months ago

honestly, the guy's ribs look like theyre gonna break

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 13 points 6 months ago
[–] ChaCh@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 6 months ago

Wtf, don’t make Americans look good!

[–] CandyPants@lemmy.ml 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 10 points 6 months ago

probably because you have a foot fetish

feet fetish revolution /j

[–] Jimbo@yiffit.net 7 points 6 months ago

Lil bro just posted foot porn

[–] alyth@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

America 1 - Europe 0

[–] BetaBlake@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago

And Brits weigh things in stone

[–] TheBlue22@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 6 months ago

I AM NOT HEARING ANYONE OUT