this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2024
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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🎡What do you get, when you never diet? 🎡 (lemmy.world)
submitted 6 months ago by The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world to c/funny@lemmy.world
16 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
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[–] anarchrist@lemmy.dbzer0.com 47 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Ooompa loompa doompity do, eat more fiber or die during a poo.

[–] itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I eat a lot of fiber and I just know I'm going out like Elvis

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 1 points 6 months ago

I eat lots of poo and you're not getting enough fiber

[–] Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca 30 points 6 months ago

What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?

Eating as much as an elephant eats?

[–] m4xie@slrpnk.net 26 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

Oom-pa, loom-pa! Doop-a-dee dest.

She, was, rea-lly de-pressed.

Oom-pa, loom-pa! Doop-a-dee dist!

Should-ah, gone-to, see-a the-ra-ah-pist!

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

rea-lly

I want you to know that read this like Ace Ventura to make the cadence work.

[–] SerotoninSwells@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago

I know it's a bit of a joke considering the post but I hope you're ok. Just in case it's not joke, if you need a hand getting to a therapist or just to vent I'm here to listen.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I want this, but since I'm hiring them, I want them to sing a song implying I was secretly an international man of mystery.

Oompa loompa doopity dater What do you get when you kill a dictator

[–] RGB3x3@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I'd tell them to do that and they'd just be like:

Oompa loompa doompity dater
What do you get as a chronic masturbater.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Oompa loompa doopity dorn

On your dick you've grown a corn

Oompa loompa doppity dock

You'll get cut from that crusty sock

Oompa loompa diggity dod

Every day you grow further from God

I don't like the smell of it

[–] Assman@sh.itjust.works 13 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Grunka lunka dunkety darmed guards..

[–] orphiebaby@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago

Watched that episode yesterday.

[–] Drusas@kbin.run 11 points 6 months ago

Oompa loompa doopity dee Should have been born with better genes

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago

What would you do when jackin kills you?

Oompa, loompa, doopity do.

[–] FiniteBanjo@lemmy.today 1 points 6 months ago

This but the 2005 version.