this post was submitted on 25 Feb 2024

176 points (80.6% liked)

Funny: Home of the Haha

5705 readers

1115 users here now

Welcome to /c/funny, a place for all your humorous and amusing content.

Looking for mods! Send an application to Stamets!

Our Rules:

Keep it civil. We're all people here. Be respectful to one another.
No sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or any other flavor of bigotry. I should not need to explain this one.
Try not to repost anything posted within the past month. Beyond that, go for it. Not everyone is on every site all the time.

Other Communities:

/c/TenForward@lemmy.world - Star Trek chat, memes and shitposts
/c/Memes@lemmy.world - General memes

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

Anticorp@lemmy.world

176

Funniest sentence wins (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago by CenturionKing@lemmy.world to c/funny@lemmy.world

146 comments fedilink hide all child comments

top 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[–] jesusrp98@lemmy.world 153 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Oh no the economy!

[–] hOrni@lemmy.world 18 points 8 months ago

The gas prices will probably go up.

[–] moistclump@lemmy.world 14 points 8 months ago

The shareholders aren’t going to like this.

[–] eguidarelli@lemmy.world 103 points 8 months ago

Houston, you have a problem.

[–] arymandias@feddit.de 60 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

“Why did the earth suddenly teleport ten times closer to the moon.” Then probably something like: “how can an object have sufficient kinetic energy to perfectly perforate the earth but still keep it mostly in tact” also “why is the asteroid burning if it is outside of the atmosphere”. Unless Hans Zimmer was playing in the background, then I would probably say “Dear god!”.

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 60 points 8 months ago

"Starting to think we'll never get Half-Life 3...."

[–] elbucho@lemmy.world 57 points 8 months ago

Thanks, Obama.

[–] the_beber@lemm.ee 47 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That‘s gonna negatively impact the trout population.

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

there is definitely a negative correlation between trout numbers and the number of large asteroids that hit the earth

[–] bzarb8ni@lemm.ee 43 points 8 months ago

"NOT THE EARTH!!

That's where I keep all my stuff!"

 - the tick

[–] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 38 points 8 months ago (1 children)

"MY CABBAGE!"

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] neatchee@lemmy.world 36 points 8 months ago (8 children)

"Asphyxiation, hypothermia, starvation, self-harm....Asphyxiation, hypothermia, starvation, self-harm....Asphyxiation, hypothermia, starvation, self-harm............. Dammit this is a difficult choice...."

[–] teft@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Asphyxiation is 10-15 seconds in the vacuum of space. The others are significantly longer.

Just saying.

load more comments (1 replies)

load more comments (7 replies)

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

At least I brought my towel

[–] Phen@lemmy.eco.br 32 points 8 months ago

Last man standing, bitches.

[–] HELLZBELLY@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Well... shit.

[–] LemmyFeed@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Or "well... fuck."

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] crushyerbones@lemmy.world 25 points 8 months ago

Nooo the economy

(Stolen from another meme)

[–] Jimmycakes@lemmy.world 25 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You don't say anything you just take your helmet off

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 25 points 8 months ago

Don't panic.

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 24 points 8 months ago

"Well that just happened" - Any Marvel Hero

[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 22 points 8 months ago (2 children)

what will

What would.

load more comments (2 replies)

[–] Insig@lemmy.world 21 points 8 months ago

I should have brought my towel...

[–] skeeter_dave@sh.itjust.works 21 points 8 months ago (1 children)

At least climate change got solved

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] Pharmacokinetics@lemmy.world 21 points 8 months ago

This is gonna ruin the economy.

[–] KISSmyOS@feddit.de 21 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I love it when a plan comes together.

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] Immersive_Matthew@sh.itjust.works 20 points 8 months ago

Sweet. Not going to have to face that upcoming election result.

[–] teamevil@lemmy.world 19 points 8 months ago

Shit....that's where I kept all my stuff.

[–] OldWoodFrame@lemm.ee 17 points 8 months ago

Shakira Shakira

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

Oh shit, the economy!

[–] Alexstarfire@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

Shit, I forgot to pack potatoes.

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Well, now I don't have to return those videos to Blockbuster.

[–] neatchee@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (4 children)

Blockbuster

.... Who wants to tell 'em?

load more comments (4 replies)

[–] Daxtron2@startrek.website 13 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Need an xkcd to figure out how fast it would be going to plow straight through the whole earth like that.

[–] quantumantics@lemmy.world 16 points 8 months ago (1 children)

https://what-if.xkcd.com/20/ towards the end he covers this sort of scenario in the form of a diamond sphere.

[–] Daxtron2@startrek.website 10 points 8 months ago

I never should've doubted Randall

[–] lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca 12 points 8 months ago

See Linda, this is why I didn't want to go visit your mother!

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 12 points 8 months ago

AAAAAAAH

as I get pelted by Earths space debris

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago

"Finally, it was damn fucking time"

[–] ItsGhost@sh.itjust.works 12 points 8 months ago

Really simple

“Bollocks”

[–] Tristaniopsis@aussie.zone 11 points 8 months ago

Oh. Fuk.

[–] erie09@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago

"Awww, my sunglasses were in there!"

[–] hOrni@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm Polish so "Kurwa".

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] elbucho@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Well, at least I don't have to worry about my student loans anymore.

[–] Vilian@lemmy.ca 10 points 8 months ago

"LMAO fuck you jeremy"

[–] Captain_Buddha@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It's just a little asteroid... it's stil good, it's still good!

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.ml 9 points 8 months ago

Huh, that's not ideal

[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 9 points 8 months ago

No words. Just stand there still for a second, then just drop those boxes and remain standing there.

load more comments