Microblog Memes

I'm tasty.

I'm not particularly good at any one thing. I have a PhD, but not in a subject that's "practical" in the post apocalypse. I'm physically fit enough, but I'm not a paragon of strength or agility. Relatedly, I'm in my mid30s, so not old, but not spry either. I'm handy enough to fix things with instruction and some light jury-rigging, but I'm hardly a Macguyver-type. I've never fired a gun before, but I can probably learn to use one.

Assuming I'm not killed instantaneously, or shortly thereafter, I'm an extra set of hands or an additional mouth to feed, depending on your perspective. Charitably, I'm analytically-minded and useful enough in the field, low to middle management type; less charitably, I'm an NPC type that happens to have some amusing dialog.

In a movie or tv show following a group in the post apocalypse, I think I'd be like the 4th to die; dignified enough to have established a minor story arch, but certainly not enough to be a main character. Also not so unimportant that I'm killed off screen (or worse yet, ret-conned).

Gallows humor and wisecracks, mostly.

I have an infinite amount of patience, diplomacy and faith in the importance of solidarity

I have a lot of knives.

That's an awful skill. +1 zombies to worry about? An extra corpse to get rid of? Please don't. Get a useful hobby instead. Gardening, carpentry, chemical engineering, knitting - all much more useful for survival.

Nice try skynet.

I have a lot of water purification capability. And a couple of guns and a little ammo. Hell yeah I'll eat whatever critters come my way if I need to. Hunting rules go out the window when all of society is starving. We'll manage to kill off all of the animals on earth at this rate. Funny thing is, governments are mostly to blame. It wouldn't be a problem except they're all greedy as fuck. The people and the earth pay the price.

As I said in another comment. my special skill is preparation and planning.

I have millions of books on subjects ranging from social economics to medical texts. these are stored on my personal servers.

I have hand picked the most essential and placed them on SD cards in case power is hard to come by. I have two e-ink readers that can be used to read the cards.

I also have physical books of immediate needs like FM 21-76. Some medical texts as well as pharmaceutical. I also have textbooks from school so that my kids can continue their education.

I have an insane amount of movies and television. ranging from adult to kid content. I have collected a wide ranging spank bank(6tb!). When shit gets rough, people will give up anything to feel "happy normal" again.

I'm currently in the process teaching myself how to train AI models on content(more of a hobby). I'd like to train some models on the books I have and base them on specific topics like medical, construction, etc...

That's a fair point too. I grew up very poor. I learned to be resourceful and make due with what you have early on in life. If I can't source what I need it's likely I can make it.

I can farm, I can perform minor surgery/field medic, I can build buildings, I can weld, I can shoot/hunt. if there's something I can't do, it's likely in one of the books I have so that I can at least learn how to try.

always lived my life with the constant threat of all my things being taken away from me. It made me accept early on that the only thing that can't be stolen from me is my knowledge, so in essence I am my best asset for survival.

Being naturally avoidant of other people. It's always other people who pose the greatest danger in these situations.

I'm large. Good for blocking entrances and creating uneven terrain. I'm a nurse too, but all that lets me do is tell you "that's not normal" and "that's not compatible with life."

I'm a master of telling bad puns.

I really don't get people who watch Mad Max movies and think they're going to be Auntie or Immortan Joe (as if they ended up doing so well themselves anyway). And even if you are, who wants to be king of a pile of shit?

Makes no sense to me.

I'm exceptionally charismatic and can become friends with literally everyone.

That's a useful talent even pre-apoc.

Woot! I've been poor all my life, so I have experience gardening and foraging. I know the difference between poison hemlock and wild carrot, I can identify herbs that can heal, I know how to choose the best trees for food from syrup to bark bread, and I know which fruits and veggies grow best in which area

I'm also a mortician, so went through 4 years of INTENSE medical education, fighting against the students trying to become doctors. (I hate bell curves) I can cleanly dissect a body, know about ailments/diseases/biohazards, I'm not afraid of blood or wounds, can stitch up lacerations, and know which parts of the body to hit and bring an enemy down... probably should have led with that