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Short answer: we don't.
Long answer: clean up your shit, or your friend will not come over / your allowance this month will be going to my pocket. Do you want to eat? Help clean out the kitchen/dining table. I did place their plate of dinner food over the one from lunch that they didn't put away. They didn't like that.
It also varies a lot from kid to kid in my family. One of them is a crafter and a hoarder. Carton boxes, glue, scissors, pieces of paper, colored beads all over the room. Once in a while I tell her to clean up, and anything she doesn't, I will scoop up and throw away. Her sister has a spotless room... nothing to complain about. Their brother, every couple of days he will have a new videogame ask, or a new Minecraft server I should set up for him and his friends... Again, I will do so, when I see all the cans, plates of food and clothes on the floor put away.
I second this. We have a very similar situation. I will note that I've begun using a "carrot" approach as well as the stick. I now keep relatively cheap and fun crafts and electronics around. Cleaning a room and helping out will earn them a fun craft and that seems to work REALLY well lately. If you know how to solder you can buy a bunch of cheap but fun kits that you can do with them and reward them with as prizes. Today's (if they are compliant and helpful) is an FM radio. I do bigger ones if they do more, and I expect more on a weekend.