dunk tank because we're dunking on this lady's baby daddy
this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2023
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the_dunk_tank
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It's the dunk tank.
This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.
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Even without the greater context of the post, its so tiring to hear people with ADHD spoken about like they're some kind of hedonism bot without greater executive control. I live a daily life where I constantly forget what I'm doing, deal with the shame of not being able to focus on tasks like my peers, and overall start at the back of the pack in any metaphorical race and need to play catch up.
Our current society is optimized in a way that exacerbates ADHD symptoms sure, but making an exaggerated joke about undoing this societal damage isn't some "hexbear hates people with adhd" take.
There's some deeply embedded infantilization that occurs in discussions about people with neurodiverse disorders that effect executive function. It's one thing to have an explanation and identify why things take place. Its something else to take a leap and hard-associate the overuse/abuse of the most widespread device in human history with ADHD as if its some kind of cultural right to melt your neurons into a slurry with a constant flow of the garbage that is pushed on social media and beyond.
Oh my god shut the fuck up
I deal with the exact same things as you. I also deal with crippling phone addiction and agree it’s a bad thing. It’s also not a “reeducation” issue, or some sort of consumer choice. We do that because of the systemic and material conditions around us, not because were educated wrong.
There are multiple studies and lots of research that has gone into why addictions form, and the majority of it shows that people form addictions in response to life circumstances, loneliness, and alienation. It isn’t a “western thing” to be addicted to your phone. It isn’t something caused by an infantile attitude or a moral failing. It is caused by constant alienation and stress inherent to capitalism. There is a reason that China had to ban children playing online video games.
I am not “infantilizing” anyone. It is not “infantilization” to point out how a statement could be construed or used to harm people with ADHD.
Fuck off with your neurodiversity-scab mentality. ADHD people don’t owe general society “adult behavior”, and it isn’t “infantilization” to ask for preferential treatment. As someone with ADHD, I want accommodations and preferential treatment, and you should too. Stop throwing others with ADHD that need that treatment under the bus so you can get brownie points with neurotypical people.
I hate this phrasing as if other people’s minds and bodies are your property and they owe you good health. They don’t. People do not owe you or anyone else good mental or physical health, and the moralization of health is another example of the crippling individualization of society.
Cease. This is just individualistic blabbering.
And, at any point, did you ever consider that my response could have been exaggerated as well? Why is a statement given jester’s privilege, but the responses to it aren’t? I do not legitimately believe anyone on this site hates ADHD people. It was a blatant joke and exaggeration of my actual point.
No I did not an I'm sorry for that.
Was the original comment you responded to edited? I notice you keep using "reeducation" when the comment said "rehabilitation", which might be cause for why we're arguing.
Respected, have a good day, sorry to be annoying and fighting for a debate.
Ok well now I feel bad
Yes I actually could have misread that, and um, yes that is very different, especially because “rehab” implies treatment as opposed to ideological reconditioning
I apologize for being so rude. Everything I said in the last comment does not apply in this case. I was extremely accusatory and I deeply apologize for that and do not think any of those were true.
I was a bit rude too, possibly because I hold some self-resentment myself, but also I've had to derive my own methods for dealing with things, and tend to feel like we don't talk the "what next"s enough.
It feels good to be given the space to be a bit special and have needs accounted for, but i've found it all goes out the window when you need to go out and do things. Every time I've given myself that space, I take it for granted and have an even harder time participating in "normal" spaces, which hurts even more than if I just kept up the momentum. I can't expect the people I meet in day to day life to have a grasp on my condition. They've got other stuff going on. The "normal" spaces will always exist to an extent. Someone working 10 hours a day out of the back of a van won't have the energy or care to educate themselves on conditions unless its personal.
Like I think as a community we should have more people offering help to break certain comfort-based cycles. Addiction is the same for anything, and you need to want to break the cycle to get better. I don't think we should shame people for being addicted, but we should still encourage improvement. When I see sentiments that are basically "its okay" without the second step, it makes me feel frustrated because having a safe space wont help me the next time I piss someone off for being a little too autistic. I need to catch it ahead of time and understand myself better to interface with the rest of the world.
Wholesome moment at the end of a frustrating interaction
I always want to keep it wholesome here. I don't want my bear site to become a bad site.
I don’t think you were too rude, but I don’t know what rude is, i'm too autistic.
I understand your feelings and think they’re valid, but I feel like a decent chunk of this is a pretty self-blaming… I don’t know how to put it, but culturally, it’s not an immutable fact of life that people jump to conclusions about why others do things. In this sense, I disagree that “normal” spaces will always exist, because human beings are very mutable. And if they aren’t, we will make them mutable
I think, under capital, it is both understandable and practical to desire to have actual advice from fellow neurodivergent comrades rather than “it’s ok”, but the world we live in is not a just one and is not the one we will always have. We should keep in mind the limitations we have right now, yes, but this will not be how it is forever, nor should it be.
The amount of demand placed on the neurodivergent, let alone the neurodivergent who are also addicted to something, is absurd, and only seems reasonable because the demands put on most people are already absurd.
While it is superficially true that you have to want to overcome an addiction, that alone is hilariously insufficient, and in the case of ADHD people addicted to social media, I have never heard of an instance of someone not wanting to.
The reason why people say “it’s ok” isn’t because they think it’s ok to be addicted to social media, but because the mindset that we’ve created around addiction and neurodivergent addiction is deeply toxic and harmful, and people want to combat that. We treat it as this fault caused by immutable personal traits, or worse, a random happenstance that has no social or material context to it. We blame the addicted individual for every aspect of what they are experiencing, when the truth of addiction is quite the opposite; they have very little direct control over what they are going through.
I don’t think comfort is the issue at all. The issue is that we’ve made addiction comfortable in the first place. We (society
) make addiction comfortable, then judge others for getting addicted. How fucked up is that?
And, in cases outside of addiction, or even things that we perceive as obsessive but really aren’t (IE: special interest in something like fish idk), “it’s ok” is a revolutionary statement. It is a belief that, even if no one will ever accept us for who we are and what we do, that we will continue to be ourselves and force them to do so. In that case, qualifying it merely muddies the message, diluted the subversive implications.