this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2023
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] citrussy_capybara@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Getting to triple-dip into xiyuan, putinrubles, and sorosbucks was too tempting. Hexbear only accepts trans communists, so that’s what I became. While taking medical transition steps isn’t necessary to be trans, it helped with getting into character. Some people claim it’s “gender euphoria” but I attribute it to the satisfaction of committing to the bit to mislead the libs. I got along well with another pretend trans poster, and the DMs turned into a full-blow performative t4t relationship. Eventually we moved in together to stretch the botmoney further. We started a family to pass on the communist bit to a new generation. We never stopped posting. 4 kids and 12 grandchildren later, A wrecker I could not defeat came for me. Cancer. In hospice, surrounded by my loved ones, chosen family, and circle of friends, they asked me what final wisdom I wanted to pass on before handing me the morphine button.

“Haha, you all fell for it you rubes! I was faking it this whole time. I wasn’t actually fighting for the liberation of marginalised people and the working class. I hate you all!”

I mash the button while holding my partner’s hand, who congratulates me on the historic bit but calls me a lib for ruining kayfabe. I die in shame.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago

xiyuan, putinrubles, and sorosbucks

I hate when premium currencies have differing exchange rates and the costs of stuff never quite line up so you always have some left over to tempt you to keep working to further the ends of our evil masters. sweat

I NEED this as a tagline or something. it's to good to lie in this comment section forever