Maybe it's to do with how it happens. For me, I came to this self discovery after struggling with severe mental health problems that didn't seem to have any explanation.

Realising I'm autistic was an incredible release from self blame.

I think there's a unique journey for parents of autistic children, though. And not an easy one.

Be kind and patient with yourself.

@neamhsplach

[–] dpnash@mastodon.online 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

@Zumbador @TechyDad @neamhsplach A lot of it may boil down to this:

Was #ActuallyAutistic a label chosen *by* you, as a result of accurate and compassionately-communicated information?

Or was it chosen *for* you, by people who were more interested in trying to “solve the problem” that is you, and are ultimately not motivated by acting for your own well-being?

(I spent most of my life in the second camp, and even on the best days, the term “autistic” is emotionally fraught for me.)

[–] Zumbador@mefi.social 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

@dpnash

Very true. And definitely something late realised autistic people are often not aware of.

But I meant to ask a different question, which is why people in the first group (realising they're autistic vs having been diagnosed by someone else ) sometimes have such different experiences.

@TechyDad @neamhsplach

[–] Pathfinder@universeodon.com 1 points 1 year ago

@Zumbador @dpnash @TechyDad @neamhsplach@beehaw. org
Perhaps it's as simple as, did you come to realise you were autistic because you were searching for an answer. And whilst autism might not be the one you wanted it is still a relief to have one. Or, was the realisation thrust upon you, perhaps by seeing yourself in your child. In which case you're having to deal with something unsought for.