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PSA: The secret magic word to make Hexbears disappear is "Disengage." (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Zuzak@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

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That's it. Our instance requires us to stop responding if you explicitly ask us to. It's right here buried in our Code of Conduct

Any discussions may be opted out of by disengaging.

In the past, this rule has only applied to the specific user you say it to. I'd like to suggest going forward that if someone on another instance uses it, we treat it as applying to all of us.

Unfortunately this rule wasn't communicated clearly before, so I'm making this post for visibility.

Edit: As the comments clarify, this has to be done in good faith, typically just a one word "disengage" comment. If you add more stuff to the discussion and then say "disengage" at the end, you're not disengaging, it's a way to put a stop to a toxic argument not to get the last word in.

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[-] SunriseParabellum@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago

Any discussions may be opted out of by disengaging.

I have always interpreted that as meaning YOU have to disengage, not that you can tell other people to "disengage". People here have tried to end an argument by telling other to disengage while they keep on arguing, which is just a cheap attempt to get the last word.

[-] RedQuestionAsker2@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago

You're interpretation is correct. Saying disengage to end an argument has never been enforced.

The only time something similar is enforced is when a user follows the person they are replying to into different comments and threads.

[-] PM_ME_YOUR_FOUCAULTS@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago

The person asking to disengage has to disengage as well. Ideally the format is just saying "disengage" and the other person leaves it at that

[-] SunriseParabellum@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago

You could just disengage by, yah know, not replying. What's the point of saying "disengage"?

[-] PM_ME_YOUR_FOUCAULTS@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago

I actually kind of agree with you on this one, but some people don't have the self control to do this when they're in the midst of a heated argument
It also covers cases where one person does that but the other person keeps replying to them elsewhere in the thread or in another thread, keeping the argument going
And also we didn't have a block function then, if you really need someone to get off your ass then there had to be some way to handle it and this is what was decided on

[-] SunriseParabellum@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

It also covers cases where one person does that but the other person keeps replying to them elsewhere in the thread or in another thread, keeping the argument going

Well yeah I agree with that, should be bannable. But fell like there's more eloquent ways of initiating it than saying "disengage" flatly to someone. Comes off as a bit of a condescending way to end a convo.