this post was submitted on 12 Dec 2024
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Sure, there are always outliers and you can correct me if I'm wrong, but that's just the overall impression I have.

(I wasn't sure if !asklemmy@lemmy.world or this community would fit better for this kind of question, but I assume it fits here.)

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[–] TimeSquirrel@kbin.melroy.org 96 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I'm here because I DON'T want to have to read fucked up opinions. People here are mostly nice compared to mainstream platforms.

I'm all for difference of opinion, but not when one of those opinions is "we should oppress LGBT people" for example. 10-15 years ago, I'd have been more receptive to discussing opposing opinions, but shit has changed. A lot of those opposing opinions are now simply unacceptable to even entertain, because they've become a real, actual threat to my well-being. People aren't discussing tax policy anymore, they are discussing imposing states of emergency to do some kind of purge on undesirables.

Some people call it an echo chamber, I just call it chilling and having fun with like-minded people. There's nothing wrong with that. That's what forums have always been.

[–] cRazi_man@lemm.ee 24 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

People here are mostly nice compared to mainstream platforms.

Try disagreeing with the hive mind. Anyone can be nice to someone who echo's their own opinion. The real niceness of a person is revealed when they can show civility to people they disagree with (I'm not talking about LGBTQ oppressors or Nazis......there's a huge spectrum of opinions that aren't extreme).

[–] Blaze@feddit.org 20 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm on BlueSky on top of IceShrimp because anything better than Twitter is good to use at this point.

Let's see how downvoted I get.

[–] Serinus@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm also on BlueSky as well as Mastodon, because BlueSky has the momentum right now, and critical mass is important.

In that same vein, I wish you'd treat LW as you do any other instance. We're not hostile to other instances, and I think there's a healthy balance right now. It doesn't hurt Lemmy to have a bigger, more mainstream instance. I think defederation solely for the sake of defederation does hurt Lemmy.

[–] Blaze@feddit.org 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

I wish you’d treat LW as you do any other instance. We’re not hostile to other instances, and I think there’s a healthy balance right now. It doesn’t hurt Lemmy to have a bigger, more mainstream instance. I think defederation solely for the sake of defederation does hurt Lemmy.

I never advocated for defederation of LW, just for more decentralization rather than have 90% of the active communities on LW.

You never answered my latest comment: https://lemmy.world/comment/13624614

Just to make it sure, are you saying that it's not true that at this moment

What prevents you from locking !television@lemmy.world, redirect to !showsandmovies@lemm.ee, and get that community more active?

I can even make you or any other LW mod mod of that community too, I'm not attached to being a mod, I just want communities to flourish on other instances as well.

[–] Serinus@lemmy.world -1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Because besides monthly active users, LW has 4,600 subscribers where lemm.ee has 537. It's not a clear cut case.

[–] Blaze@feddit.org 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

What good is 4600 subscribers when 754 are active?

I just checked the updated numbers, now it's 2.57k monthly active users for lemm.ee vs 958 on LW.

On !showsandmovies@lemm.ee, we actively build the community, we have a best of 2024 post, we opened the moderation posts to any person willing to help, while you keep that community unmoderated with 2 bots as mods.

Really, I just don't understand. What are you afraid of? I'm pretty sure that !mapporn@lemmy.world had more subs than !map_enthusiasts@sopuli.xyz when it was locked down, but it was still okay, because the activity was happening on the sopuli instance.

I just checked, !electricvehicles@lemmy.world has more subscribers than !electricvehicles@slrpnk.net , but the slrpnk community was still chosen when the consolidation happened: https://lemm.ee/post/46935805

If you're afraid about losing the people, you just pin a post, point to the new community, similar to !casualconversation@lemmy.world, and that's it.

I did everything fair. "Not happy with the community? Create your own, and become the better one!". I did, everything, and while we've had success, the LW staying open hinders the growth of that topic as a whole.

You ask me to treat LW as any other instance, but no other instance is reacting in that way, preferring to keep some of their communities open when other people actively try to build an active community on a topic that apparently only a few people are interested in anyway.

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I don't know. I am still as opinionated and difficult as I ever was on Reddit, but I also turn it around, display civility, and cede points far more often here. Maybe I'm becoming better, but I think it's just a better situation overall.

[–] TheFonz@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've received way more bitter and raged out responses here than I've ever received on Reddit for very lukewarm vanilla takes. I'm not saying Lemmy is full of extremists but there is a user base here that is all or nothing. My guess is it's age related though.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Overall the people here are nicer.

The extremes are higher though - some people were booted from Reddit for a reason, and they came here.

[–] TheFonz@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yea. I agree. There is a nice median and really strong extremes. But those extremes sometimes hog up the convo.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social -1 points 1 week ago

The presence of the high end of the extreme is what blew me away though. On Reddit I had given up all hope bc it never happened (even from myself, as I kept becoming more defensive, more snarky but less kind) while here the fact that it sometimes, heck even often happens, is just... outstanding!:-) 😍

Also the low end of the extreme is concentrated into specific instances, such that blocking Lemmygrad.ml and hexbear.net will improve someone's experience on the Fediverse by ~90%, and then blocking users from lemmy.ml (with the PieFed Lemmy alternative, or either the Sync or Connect Lemmy apps, or lemmy.cafe, dubvee.org, or quokk.au at the instance admin level) improves by a further 90% I found.

So the structure of the curve matters greatly here, to someone's quality of experiences in the Fediverse.:-)

[–] supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The version of someone you invite in the door determines the initial trajectory of how that person will act in the community. You can invite in the leading edge of someone's developing kindness or invite in the ossifying mass of their nature that is threatening to turn hateful and uncaring. No one instance of invitation to a new person (however that may happen, formally or informally) pushes the needle far either way within any one particular person (though sometimes it can radically do so) but the overall integrated effect is a moderate shift of the an entire community towards the better or worse version of the community members. When this effect is used for good people often describe the resulting community space as a community that accepts them for who they are or more succintly is a genuinely safe space.

Of course, every interaction is in an invitation in some small way, it doesn't just happen once.

[–] SARGE@startrek.website 16 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Yeah, I don't think anyone would ask you "Are you okay with sitting at the bar with nazis?" yet plenty will happily judge you for saying "I'd rather not have to deal with MAGAts and their opinions"

Sorry but if your opinion is "trans people aren't people" or "blacks need to know their place" then your opinion is shit and no the fuck I don't have to listen to it

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But another question, "are you ok with sitting at the bar with nazis, but they're wearing red shirts with a hammer and sickle on them and espousing the same propensity for murder?"

Lemmy is fine with murder and genocide so long as you wear the right shirt while doing it.

Source: .ml, grad, hexbear.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I agree, which is why I recently kicked a MAGA guy out of my D&D group that meets at my house. I had tolerated him up to then because he generally acted decent and was a good player. But after the election I decided I just don't feel like extending my hospitality to that anymore.

But on the flip side when I hear a phrase like, "uncomfortable with trans people" my first reaction is, "What makes you uncomfortable?" instead of, "Fuck you you fucking bigoted fuck!" For that moral imperfection in my character I've received name-calling and at least one ban. Whatever. People have irrational fears and I'm not going to exile them to the desert because their "eww" reflex isn't pristine.

[–] FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Honestly the tankie takes justifying atrocities is nearly as bad as the conservative takes justifying the same.

[–] Skiluros@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Why nearly? They are just as bad, if not worse.

[–] trevor@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Nah. Tankies are wrong, but they're also powerless. Conservatives actually have power though, and are extremely dangerous.

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 week ago

An idea being "bad" is power agnostic. If I want to blow up orphanages, wanting to do so is bad whether I'm the president or a homeless dude, the ability to follow through may change with power, but the ability to follow through isn't what makes "wanting to blow up orphanages" bad, the idea itself is bad.