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Well, I guess we're about a week away from Vance having a gay affair scandal.
In his book he told his grandma he thought he was gay and she asked him if he likes "sucking dicks", and he said "no", so she told him he wasn't gay.
So no doubt he has some repressed feelings.
Edit - This of course could have been when he discovered he was into couches and dolphin porn.
Sucking dick? Not gay.
A bear railing me in my ass while I rail a femboy twink in his? Still not gay. That's the secret guys. Just don't suck dick and never gay.
CartmanButters.jpg
Listen. It's just a couple straight dudes havin sex. Nothin gay about it.
None of that makes sense as a truthful story. First I don't think a grandmother would use that "want to suck dicks" phrasing when speaking to her grandson, but also the laughing at him and saying "fucking idiot, how would you know you're gay?" is in direct contradiction to the later "it would be OK, god would still love you" line. Those two things wouldn't come from one person. I think it's a cobbled together story of things he heard from different people at different times, presented as a conversation with his grandmother.
This whole interaction with his grandma is so fucked up. Even if her logic was sound what 8 or 9 year old, gay or straight, is thinking about sticking dicks. JD needs some therapy.
News flash: some people who want to have sex with penis-having people do not like having penises in their mouths.
(I'm not one of them mind you, but they exist).
That’s kind of the whole point of that phrase being highlighted. It’s not that anyone actually thinks that because young J.D was asked about sucking dicks and he said no, that he’s magically removed of all homosexual thoughts, and to be gay you need to like sucking dicks.
The implication is highlighting to be that he could be repressed bi or gay from his grandmothers rhetorical question.
Frot's more like sofa-fucking, so that might be closer to his comfort zone.
The projection is the tell.
If "gay" was interpreted as "weird" by young Vance, then honestly he might be hiding some genuinely weird kinks. Like... Dude might actually be a couch fucker.
I cannot imagine a funnier turn of events than real evidence coming out that he fucks couches. Like we’re just joking because he seems the type and it’s gross and weird but harmless and while I don’t like the idea of people fucking their own couch I’m fully of the opinion that banning it would be government overreach. So yeah, it would be hilarious if evidence of that came forward.
I mean he did know he wanted to find a woman into dolphins because both were highlighted showing they were his search terms.
Peter Theil is overtly weird af, just saying.
Let me put it this way: If I went to JD's house and he was doing the cooking, I'd look with deep suspicion at any sauce that was on the entree. I also wouldn't leave him alone with my kids or dog.
sigh please don’t be with anyone I know…