z500

I thought that number looked familiar

Harambe's death was the nexus connecting all timelines

I've found my people

Apparently I spin clockwise in bed because my pajamas are always all the way to the left when I wake up

It's real

TFW a passenger turns up the radio to cover a fart

Illuminati confirmed

You bloody bastard!

Back when computer monitors were big enough, my cat would sit on that and I would have to keep moving his tail out of the way

I literally did that today. First I dumped the laundry on the couch, and then a few hours later I folded it and put it away

Powerthirst is also crystal meth