vestmoria

countries I have in mind are most of the EU, east Asian and south American multiparty democracies, our neighbors Canada and Mexico.

As I see it, these countries share with the US more than with other countries, like African, central Asian or south Asian countries, where liberal democracy and its practice only exists on paper. Up to now, we shared common values like the rule of law, free markets, freedom of the press, political liberalism, atlanticism for our security, our trust in science, institutions and facts... The US was an ally, an indispensable one you might add, even a benign one in some circles.

Now this ally has turned to a bully in an incredibly short period of time: in less than a week trump has started bullying Denmark so they sell Greenland to the US, threatened about taking the Panama channel back, also threatened most of America's trade partners with tariffs if they don't do what he wants, pausing aid to Ukraine, in effect condemning that country to be absorbed by Russia within the next 2 years, he even wants an American flag on Mars... what for?

I don't see why he thinks our trade partners wont also raise their tariffs to our stuff if we do so. What I also don't understand is why he blames the victim (Ukraine) and cozies up to putin. Not even Reagan would have done something like that.

Autocrats in the world are sure having a good time watching our disunity work to their favor.

I wonder what's going to replace the post WW2 and post cold war order, now that liberal democracy is being so successfully attacked from the maga right and people trust more what they read on their ecochamber than what centrist, established media report (I'm not saying that the Washington Post, NPR or the LA Times are neutral, but are more neutral that fox 'news' or 'news'max).

I'm a nurse and I don't do night shifts. The few times I did it I earned a 150% differential but it's not worth the money: I'd go back home and have to use noise cancelling headphones to sleep, 'cause people are loud, I'd wake up rested at 04:00 pm, but completely destroying my circadian rhythm. I'd need a whole day or 2 to recover my regular rhythm because otherwise I'd be a zombie.

I hear my coworkers who do night shift complaining about this same issue, but they still pick up night shifts, which I don't understand.

To me it was impossible to have something akin to a life while working night shift, but I've met some people that only do night shifts: the housewife that only works 4 nights shifts per month, the single mother or young wife or husband who work 14 night shifts per month and have the next 2 weeks for him/herself...

I don't understand why they do it. It's extremely taxing and not worth it imho.

But if you do, how do you have a life? And how do you keep yourself healthy?

Our protagonist is a sex crazed young man who is convinced that the only way he can have sex is if he has a car, so he goes to a dealership to try several models, only to be treated like an idiot by the dealer, who only sells him overpriced crap. At least that's what I get from the movie.

The dealer hits the same child in the head two times in the movie, both times when the dealer finds out the client is so gullible he'll pay anything for a status symbol so he can finally have sex, both times with the child's parents present.

Is this a trope in Japan? Not the buy a status symbol to have x, but hitting a child in the head.

I've been working at my hospital for 2 years already.

I first applied to several wards in the same, huge hospital, most managers didn't bother to answer me, one agreed an interview with me, only to send me the second in charge, who told me about several units were I could work at, but he offered me no position.

There was one manager however who made it easy for me to shadow several nurses in several units. She was my first manager.

Long story short, managers started moving elsewhere, new manager comes in, I don't trust this new manager, applied to be transferred, yesterday my transfer was approved to another ward with a manager who seems to be nice, but everyone is nice 'till they stop being such.

And I wonder if I should, sometime in the future, apply to those wards managed by the same people that 2 years ago rejected and outright ignored me, because it's always good to have a plan b on the back burner and I'm running out of managers within my hospital I haven't interviewed with.

On one side: no, applying again is a waste of time as they made pretty clear what they think of you and people don't change. You are effectively blacklisted.

On the other side... I don't know.

on the one hand this is what I said I wanted. The truth is more nuanced: I'm not quitting the job neither most of my coworkers: I'm quitting my manager and some childish coworkers.

on the other hand, why do I have the one to quit to keep my sanity? It's not fair.

It sucks that the ones who give attention to the manager are the ones in good graces with her and that the quiet one who works when they go smoking and gossiping gets ignored, unrecognized and treated worse because he doesn't want to play office politics.

A rational person would understand the difference between the things I can change and what I cannot change, but a part of me is still screaming for vengeance.

What I said on other posts about being scared still applies.

her mother died 2 weeks ago.

I told her I'm sorry but after thinking about what to say I couldn't come with anything better than repeating sorry again. She then told me and another coworker how she died.

I want to show her that I care but I don't want her mother's death to become the elephant in the room each time we talk.

This is not romantic in any way.

I don't know if I should change the title to 'does unbiased media exist?'

I just found out a Washington Post cartoonist quit after a Bezos satire she draw was rejected.

I was until today a reader of said newspaper, but after this kind of censorship I don't know if I should keep reading it.

Note that I'm not looking for media sources that fabricate outrage either for the left or for the right or news sources whose business model is to editorialize titles to work people up. I'm just looking for unbiased media sources.

Maybe this was a stupid question: everyone is biased, or am I wrong?

people do not quit jobs, they quit managers and I personally would like to quit some coworkers.

Basically the manager says in public that I'm good and passionate about the job but privately she writes the opposite. She never talked to me about what I need to improve, if anything. And then has the gall to tell me to trust her if I want to open up to her. Two faced, not to trust.

I only found out when another manager read to me what she wrote about me.

I was never good at playing office politics. FWIW I don't like the job, I do it because I need money and I'm good at it.

I'm not implying every nurse or doctor does this, but couldn't come up with a better title.

A cognizant patient is above all a free person. A free person is free to accept and to deny care, whatever may come. It's his life, let him live his life as he sees fit. Explain, educate, inform and then ask: do you understand that if we don't do this you may die / lose a limb / lose your liver / fall down and have a stroke and end up bed bound if we're lucky enough to save your life?

I don't understand the logic playing mental gymnastics to make a patient stay at a unit because the nurse or doctor in charge are convinced it's in the patient's best interest to do so, even when after education he wants to leave. I'm the odd one at my unit, as most of my coworkers do vehemently disagree with me, as they expect me to provide care AND to care. They feel they lost if a patient leaves against medical advice.

To me it looks like they don't understand individual freedom and forget that a patient is still a free person. I wouldn't want to be my coworkers' patient.

You cannot stop grown ups from making stupid choices. The cognizant patient gets to decide his answer. Not a nurse or doctor convinced they get to decide for the patient.

Another problem I see: say you force a cognizant patient to stay at your unit because you are convinced you are doing the right thing. Why do you think he's going to be a pleasant patient to work with? People lash out when they feel trapped and they insult and punch personnel. What's the point?

Punched coworkers will call in sick and start looking for jobs elsewhere, some insulted ones too.

Wouldn't it be better to inform, document, let him leave, move on?

I've tried the serenity prayer without god and I'm reading the subtle art of not giving a f*ck, but it's not enough. The book is good though.

There are still moments when people really piss me off and while I'd like that not to affect me, my first instinct is still to feel anger and to hate the jackass making my life or work difficult. Sometimes I'd like to punch him in the face.

It could be the plumber who doesn't come on the agreed day, the technician who 'repaired' a tv set, only to have the same issue the next day, a coworker who keeps yelling when I'm trying to work and even after asking him not to be loud, blatantly ignores me or coworkers who importunate me with stupid questions about my weekend.

A strategy I'm going to use now at the workplace is to ignore every non related job question from these people and only answer when they ask something job related. As for the plumber, the hate usually subsides after 2 days, but I'd like to be more resilient, not to jump to anger and hate so easily.

It's like I'm emotionally very easy to trigger.

I don't know if you agree with this sentence: A person who yells does it because he doesn't have power to modify a situation to his advantage, because he is powerless.

This is how I feel sometimes.

I believe this is something only each of us can answer, because where each person draws the line is always going to be different, or am I wrong?

I don’t know if I’m being reasonable with my red lines:

My parents are conservative Mexican. I was raised with Christian dogmas and clear social roles (men don’t cook or do the laundry, only women do). To my parents and people like them, family, or what they think of as family, comes always first: It is imperative we all meet several times a year, even if you don’t want to, because that’s what we’re supposed to do. I’m expected to attend, to pretend I like my extended family (people I have nothing in common with), to “do it for them” (for my parents, in the past this form of emotional manipulation worked, since 4 months it doesn’t anymore). I hated that as a child and if I ever have children I won’t put them to such BS.

My grandfather was mentally ill and insulted me, my siblings and my mother for most of my childhood until he died, while my father enabled that pos. In Mexico it is expected that families take care of such issues within the family, because asking for help elsewhere means the family loses face. I’ve already told my parents that if they ever become psychologically unstable and start insulting and ranting no stop, I’m not going to take care of them, I’m calling APS. I don’t know if they registered it when I said it.

Maybe because I was raised in such a strict, self censoring and conformist family I now want to defend my independence at any cost. Cue meeting people halfway or being a doormat.

If a woman I’m dating asks me to do “something for her”, my first instinct will be to run no looking back and ghost. If I stay trying to convince her that’s not a good idea explaining why, that means in my book she already manipulated me into listening to her and that she can keep manipulating me. I don’t know if this is self sabotage, but I see it as self defense.

If a woman I’m dating asks me about my parents and the issue of providing for elderly parents is discussed, it wouldn’t make any sense to sugarcoat it, I’d say what I just wrote here. If she accuses me of being a psychopath and starts with “they’re your parents”, as if that was a reason good enough to forgive everything in the past, I’d run and ghost. I don’t know if you see this as self sabotage, but I see it as self defense.

There are other examples I’ve heard at the workplace over couple problems that to me are simply ludicrous and would make me want to run away:

he wanted Chinese, she wanted Mexican and couldn’t agree what restaurant to call. My solution would be to order what I want, telling my partner to order what she wants. Why must we order from the same restaurant? Why so much drama over something so insignificant? Or she can order what she wants and I can cook.

She made weekend plans without telling him beforehand, he wanted to rest, grab a beer, go fishing and do nothing else. She wanted to have lunch with another couple (double date), he said no, because he wanted a quiet weekend and suggested she goes alone with the couple. She started yelling about not doing things together.

But why must couples do everything together? Why is doing things separately not a good idea? He gets his peace and she gets to socialize.

If meeting somebody halfway means doing something I don’t want to do, I don’t want a relationship with this person.

If a person I’m dating feels entitled to try to change me, I don’t see how a relationship would work. Am I a narcissist?

this is a continuation to my post 'where do you draw the line if you ponder quitting a job?'

manager is now 'helping' me find a position elsewhere, but I believe she dislikes me so much she wants me gone asap. Her friends have turned to silent treatment mode. Each day, she asks me if I've interviewed already. It's like she wants me to have a new job lined up before Christmas already.

it's starting to sink in that she doesn't want me, but I'm not so sure I want to quit:

I know it doesn't make any sense. As said, I dislike 30% of my coworkers and if I've already told management with my union representative present that as soon as I find something else I quit, I should be consequent and do that. I dislike getting up at 4:30 to get to work at 06:00, yet this is the kind of life I know, the routines I've grown to be used to, this gives me a feeling of security, even though I come here so often to rant and complain about my job and my coworkers.

Can you believe I'm thinking about politely asking this manager if we can work things out? I must really be bipolar.

I don't understand why I'm so incoherent. I'm the drama queen now.

I feel like a child who postured and lost.

Every crisis is an opportunity, people say, but even though I should think like this and boldly leave, I'm scared that my new position will be as bad or worse than the old one, the same drama, the same backstabbing and playing favorites. It would be really tiring to get out of the frying pan to get into the fire.