Real men telnet to the web server and manually type GET commands and read the raw HTML.

This would be funny to my redneck-ass boomer dad. I'm not sure you'll get many laughs out of this in here.

Imagine having to have a different web browser for every website you visited

I don't have to imagine it, I'm old enough to have lived through it. Websites used to say stuff like "best viewed with Netscape Navigator" or "Best with at least 800x600 resolution" because web elements back then were fixed in place and didn't resize with the browser window or resolution. It was...a different time. Wild west shit.

"Electronic music is too repetitive."

"Naww man, just listen to this!"

Chiptunes music plays as keygen opens with three more command prompt windows.

I gave up and started using Banana Pi stuff.

And with enough federated servers in the network they could never hope to have the reach of things like Lemmy and Mastodon. Server costs would be massively spread out instead of reliant on one corporation.

I got a family that likes to leave the damn light switches all on at night, I'm no longer going around and shutting them all off when everyone is in bed. Also, they are tied to my alarm, when I disarm the alarm or it goes off, they all come on.

But I'm doing all this through Home Assistant, a local open source automation server, not any of this cloud bullshit.