cowboycrustation

joined 9 months ago
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Nope, I've submitted multiple pior authorizations and get the same response every time. They know exactly what they're doing.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 4 days ago (2 children)

They wanted two separate full psychological assessments, one from a doctor that I did not have a previous patient relationship with, and one of them had to have a doctorate degree. They also wanted "proof" that I had been living as my gender for at least a year.

 

These past couple of weeks I've felt such peace over my transition. I'm still not 100% in the place I want to be yet, but I know that those changes will come eventually.

It's done so much for my mental health to be in an environment that affirms me and to automatically be gendered correctly by most people. Being on testosterone has also done a lot for me because now I can actually bear to look at pictures of myself and think "oh yeah, that's me" and not some weird being that kinda resembles me but isn't.

I remember when I was younger and thought I was trans but was so afraid and second-guessing myself all of the time. I tried to convince myself that I'd regret it.

I don't know what the future will hold. But I'm so, so glad I transitioned. I finally feel whole.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 5 days ago (4 children)

Welp, not much different for me. My insurance has insane requirements to cover HRT so I've been paying out of pocket this whole time. You'd think the big pharmaceutical companies would be lobbying against this because it makes them money.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

At this point in my life I am content with the good friends that I've made in college. I find that I have the closest friendships with queer men because there's less of an atmosphere of us both constantly trying to signal and prove our masculinity and more of a "whatever make you happy, I don't care" attitude. Less repression and insecurity, essentially.

I think that is likely. I notice myself doing the same thing subconsciously where my pitch is higher around women and lower around other men. I wonder if it's a way to seem less threatening. I'm definitely not the only guy who does that.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 32 points 5 days ago (6 children)

If you're perceived as a woman people tend to be friendlier and more polite towards you. My expierence with transitioning into a man is that people are generally more indifferent and cautious towards me now. I have to be a lot more mindful of coming across as "creepy" or "dangerous" than I used to be specifically with women who are strangers. I'm neither of those things, but the expectation of men being inherently threatening still prevails.

Genuinely baffled by her behavior.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 23 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

Honestly, just existing is a part of the fight. If people know a queer person personally and see that they're human too just like them then they're a lot less likely to dehumanize them and are more likely to help protect and fight for them. It's easy to dehumanize and be cruel to a group that you've never interacted with. But if it's your neighbor, friend, or colleague then it's no longer just some abstract concept.

That's good to know. I'm definitely gonna rush to get all of my docs changed after I get my certificate of name change in the mail. Unfortunately can't get my birth certificate changed because of the state I was born in.

Southern culture is not what you just mentioned. It is most definitely not a monolith as you're describing it.

There are a lot of sub regions of the south (such as southern Appalachian, south Atlantic, Cajun, etc). They are all very different from each other and while there are some similarities, there are a lot of differences too. One is in the way we speak. There are even varieties in southern accents. Lotta times you can tell what social class and region someone is from in the south based on their accent. Another is in the widely differing southern culinary practices. It's not the monolith the media likes to paint it as.

And culturally the south is also very different in a lot of ways. There is a strong culture of respect to elders and using your manners compared to most other places in the US. Despite what you see on the media, people tend to be non confrontational and being direct is not considered polite. If someone has an issue it's usually talked about when the person is away or in a quiet tone. People are a lot less scheduled and regimented, as well as being friendlier with strangers even in the cities. I had genuine culture shock after I moved to rural new england for the first time. It was such a contrast. I could go on and on about the specifics of southern culture if you're interested in that.

I encourage you to read up on just how rich and diverse southern culture is. You didn't say this directly, but by associating it solely with far right (presumably white) cishet MAGA Americans it actively diminishes the queer, people of color, and leftists who also are southerners and are proud of their culture. There's a lot more of us than the media and Hollywood likes to portray it as. There is also a lot more cultural baggage to being a southerner when outside of the south because of history and media portrayal and people have a myriad of assumptions just because someone is from there. I've definitely experienced it.

I would encourage you to visit and see for yourself but yeah, it's getting unsafe right now. The government is shitty, corrupt, and bigoted. I don't know if I'll be able to return home and visit my family and community (that I cherish) after trump takes office because I am trans. That doesn't make me love my home any less. My point is, southern culture is not defined by being a rural, lower class MAGA person.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Are they likely to reverse changes once they are made? Say I get my passport application/order in before he takes office. Is it still likely to go through?

 

I read something somewhere that said that we're likely to enter another stonewall era. What exactly does this mean? I'm aware of the events at the Stonewall inn but don't understand the era part of it.

 

I've come across bad news that my home state has passed a really shitty law regarding trans people. Are there things I can do to help change this and all of the other shitty policies and attitudes at home?

 

I want to preface this by saying that we have a zero tolerance policy for transphobia. Your comment will be removed and you will be banned if you spout transphobia here. Our existence is not up for debate.

That said, how do you differentiate being transgender and being trans racial?

I'm curious how to answer this question in a good faith debate with someone. Emotionally I know that they're not the same and that one is wrong and the other is not wrong, but I'm unsure as to why that is and am curious if anyone else has given any thought about it.

 

My insurance denied covering my testosterone for the second time (UGH) and I can't afford the packets I usually take here ($120 even with goodrx) so I'm wondering if the gel pump would be cheaper. Anybody know?

 

I wanted to give an update on my progress:

My voice has gotten much better. There was a period of time where it was almost hard to speak and I could barely sing and thought my voice would sound like shit forever but I am happy to report that it has leveled out. It even sounds good and has a rich tone.

Losing my voice peremantly was my biggest fear with starting T. Took the risk and I am so glad that it didn't happen.

 

ahhhhhhhhhhhh

21
Insecurities (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/ftm@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

After moving states to a much more progressive one i feel like i get clocked all of the time here, whereas back home that rarely ever happened. When i pass by male strangers they dont do the nod thing to me. its very disconcerting. I get they'd by people who don't know me. I wish I could know what it was that makes people clock me like that. It feels like I'm not man enough here. Not being stealth feels like being naked. I don't like it.

Part of me wants to talk about my experiences as a trans man because it is a unique expierence that needs to be known, but at the same time I feel like as soon as I tell people I'm trans I automatically become Man Lite™ and a bunch of assumptions are made about me. And then I'm not man enough and am not treated as any other man would be treated. I wish T would do its magic already. I'm constantly feeling dysphoric these days.

 

i have a decent amount of acne after starting T. I wash my face every night with a cleanser scrub thing but still get lots of blackheads and pimples. Any tips at how to minimize this?

 

ive been ten months on T, got plenty of new hair everywhere except my face. havent even gotten one new hair there. all the men in my family have no trouble growing facial hair. why tf am i not getting a single one

6
I'm procrastionating. AMA (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/random@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

Update: still procrastinating

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