I can't really say that I've ever felt particularly "unclean" after using just TP. But I might just give this bidet thing a try. Maybe I've been missing out all this time.

I'm already a vegetarian with a few cheat meals occasionally - are you thinking beef and chicken might make my logs less greasy?

Alright look, I swear I'm not just trying to be nasty. But poo always seemed to be......greasy.....to me. Shooting water at it seems equivalent to cleaning up oil with plain water - it just moves it around. Am I way off with this line of reasoning?

Am I the only one who thought it said "lift her lip"? Like insertion was about to happen.......maybe I'm just a bit perverted