145
Our Big Wet Boy proudly— wait a minute. What the fuck.
(hexbear.net)
He looks sooo upset.
He hates his base soooo much. 
Going to need that as an emoji stat.
Please make it happen.
:Trump-despair:
A) this is hilarious and 2) I just realized I never asked why he is called big wet boy, so why y'all call him that? lol
I'm not positive but I think it's because he's big, wet, and a boy
I mean seriously look at him.
There's a 10 ft damp radius around him.
the boy is the biggest and wettest you've ever seen, folks
Ok the first and last def make it make sense more. I think I get it. I always considered it like "greasy" tho.
The explanation I recall seeing is he almost always looks like he has just finished (or is in the middle) of sweating
And I was figuring it might have been something like that but was wondering if there was any deeper Hexbearian lore to it or something. Ty!
I think it originated with Matt Christman calling him that a few years ago.
lol this makes me even more confused. Why is Reagan BONE DRY? And why did I read that in John Mulaney's voice?
This president is BONE DRY.
it's partly literal, about their sweat levels - notice that the presidents from southern states (lbj, carter, clinton) are all various stages of wet, nixon and trump are famously very sweaty, whereas you will have a harder time finding photos of biden or reagan for example dripping sweat. but it's also vibes-based, dryer presidents are mostly more boring, lack a sort of bon vivant quality compared to the wet presidents, are a bit more put together in their public appearances. at least that's how i would try to explain it. i also disagree with some of his assessments, mostly truman and bush ii (both slightly on the wet side of the spectrum)
reagan was considered kind of a nowhere man, to such an extent that a biographer, rather than writing a biography about him, wrote a novel about a guy who just kind of ran into reagan on occasion. he was hollow, lacked a personality, a soulless quality to him. i think that plays a part in him being the dryest president
JFK was famously so dry that the CIA had to unalive him at Dow Chemical's request so that they could research his body to invent those little silica gel packs.
Ah, gotcha. That actually kind of makes sense. I think I really am having a tism day lol.
i appreciate you asking because it was fun trying to articulate what makes the tweet work both as a joke and as a (mostly jocular) analysis lol. i'm sure someone else would have an equally valid explanation, maybe christman himself has addressed it in one of the cushvlogs
You did a bang up job with the analysis lol.
Oh god you're right, I heard it that way too
I was gonna ask how someone can be so delusional as to share this photo without shame or embarassment. but then I realized - right, the same kind of person who is delusional enough to paint that in the first place
I read his 𝕏 bio and uhh
Patriot. Bible Reader. Mall Santa. I like WOMEN!
this is truly troubling. for the love of God do not let your children sit on this man's lap
I like WOMEN!
Oh.
I like WOMEN
I like WOMEN
I like the CONCEPT of a woman
in a glass bowl
his 𝕏 bio
what is that, some kind of porn site?
It's real apparently.
He looks like he had a stroke.
HOW DARE YOU.
I hope so
It looks like he spent at least three hours finishing shading the upper lip
Is that Sasha Colby??
Lmao we had the same thought around the same time
wake up babe, new trump emote just dropped
Is that Sasha Colby?
The Gary Peterson acct is fake but really funny.
Our Big ~~Wet~~ Red Boy. He looks like one of those cartoons that get red and blow off steam.
I miss the mail order first lady
Standing lessons needed
rihlania??
this post was submitted on 30 Apr 2024
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chapotraphouse
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