this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2024
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I've been wondering who are the worst anime characters to ask for relationship advice. So far I thought of Yujiro Hanma from Baki, because he would absolutely invade your privacy in the worst moments and "coach", and Mei Mei from Jujutsu Kaisen because she would not only charge a lot of money for "consultation fees", but worse, her advice would be really really bad since she is both a sociopath and a groomer...

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[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago (3 children)
[–] dat_math@hexbear.net 14 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 11 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

It's funny because I like Roshi and his fighting style (and was glad when they brought him back in Dragon Ball Super).

The only thing I hate about him is his perverseness, which is basically a relic of the 1980s humor of the original Dragon Ball manga.

[–] Dudewitbow@lemmy.zip 6 points 8 months ago

Roshi at least knows how to raise children. Goku on the other hand...

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 11 points 8 months ago

Goku is the ultimate deadbeat dad. He just keeps dying and when he's dead he doesn't try to come back to life but instead fucks off to fight in the afterlife tournaments.

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 9 points 8 months ago

Definitely... If I remember correctly he never kissed his wife once, even though they had multiple kids. The guy would probably just tell you "If she is mad at you, just go train all day and everything will be fine"...

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 14 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Char is another one, all his girlfriends he uses end up dying for him.

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

all his girlfriends he uses end up dying for him

spoilerThis is Garma and Amuro erasure.

Also, I Google searched to find that image and one of the first things I got was @Cromalin@hexbear.net's post of that pic on Hexbear lmao.

[–] Cromalin@hexbear.net 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

lmao, you can tell it's my screenshot because it's halimede's rt. what did you even search to find that?

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Image search for: bandai shareholder garma

Web search was giving me eBay links to buy one lol

[–] Cromalin@hexbear.net 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

i tried that but just got a bunch of p-bandai garma zaku custom results. but doing so in google it was the second result somehow, what the fuck?

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm guessing that my-hero fucked the bird site up so badly that it gets indexed poorly in Google results.

Then again, I'm also too stupid to understand those kinds of things.

[–] Cromalin@hexbear.net 5 points 8 months ago

maybe! i don't know, i'm shocked that hexbear showed up and not like, someone's blogspot or something

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 5 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I don't recognise him. What makes him bad for relationships advice?

[–] Dudewitbow@lemmy.zip 7 points 8 months ago (2 children)

he cares only about finding his brother, and training with his master. His childhood friend, became his personal gundam mechanic, willing to pilot one to protect him, despite not knowing how, and he only realizes she likes him after she gets captured by a suit litterally called devil gundam, the suit that also corrupted his brother.

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 5 points 8 months ago

Wow, yeah this is definitely a really good pick.

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 4 points 8 months ago

You left out the part where he's too busy playing karate with his friends, several of which have obvious crushes on him.

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Domon from G Gundam. He basically platonically dates his coworker for a year and can't express his feelings for her because his love language is karate.

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 4 points 8 months ago

Wow, that's definitely a great candidate for the least qualified to give relationship advice.

[–] Cromalin@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)

akio ohtori. loves giving advice but is always focusing on ruining your life and fucking you
mcgillis from gundam ibo. it's possible that he's running a scheme where he'll kill you. it's possible he's sincere and trying to help you! either way you're fucked if you listen to him

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, I didn't even consider malice in the equation, I originally thought of "who would be so hilariously bad at relationship advice even if they try their best", but you're right, malice is worse than anything any well meaning awful advice would be.

[–] Cromalin@hexbear.net 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

to be clear, akio spends the entire show grooming and abusing (and in many cases having sex with) the whole cast of the show, most of whom are children (ranging from 12 to 17). huge piece of shit, and incredible at picking advice that fucks you over

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 3 points 8 months ago

Akio would probably be buds with corporate-art. The whole "under qualified for his role at a school" bit matches up lol

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 6 points 8 months ago

Killy from BLAME!

Dude has zero rizz.

[–] BynarsAreOk@hexbear.net 5 points 8 months ago

Zetsubou Sensei because he would just say

"oh yeah, that's a problem for kids these days, well I guess you could just fucking go kill yourself that would solve your problems."

"Actualy thats a genius idea."

cue gag with Kafka saving him as always.

[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 5 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Oh dear God I hated that character in Jojo.

[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That's not a guy from Jojo, that's Yujirou from Baki the Grappler

[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Oh thanks.

Damn, I guess I mistook him for, err, someone else.

[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 4 points 8 months ago

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ooooooooooooooh

[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Remind me who he is? Is he a Part 5 character?

[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago (2 children)

part 3

A Stand character with pedophiliac and abusive undertones.

Can turn characters into children or babies.

Worked for Dio while our heroes were in Egypt.

[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 5 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Oh THAT episode. Eww, I must have blocked that one out of my brain lol. Worst part of Part 3.

[–] Aryuproudomenowdaddy@hexbear.net 6 points 8 months ago

I mean there's also the orangutan in part 3.

[–] MrFunnyMoustache@lemmy.ml 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Alessi. Pretty creepy indeed...

[–] Pluto@hexbear.net 3 points 8 months ago
[–] Gosplan14_the_Third@hexbear.net 4 points 8 months ago

I'm rewatching Gekkan-Shoujo Nozaki-Kun and... definitely Umetaro Nozaki. Most of the characters there actually tbf.

Otoh, I'm just as aroace as he is, unless the Manga is a spoilsport.

[–] DivineChaos100@hexbear.net 2 points 8 months ago

Kazuma Kuwabara