this post was submitted on 03 Mar 2024
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Atheist Memes

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[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 70 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm a good parent but a goat is a goat

[–] RampageDon@lemmy.world 18 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Goats are cheaper than children

[–] ThePantser@lemmy.world 31 points 8 months ago (1 children)

And they do a better job keeping the lawn mowed.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

And although they can bite, at least they don't talk back (at least in an intelligent language that you can understand)

[–] atx_aquarian@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

They might not talk, but they sure can send a message.

[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 3 points 8 months ago

The next thing you know is news headlines:

Goats invented telepathy

[–] BlackArtist@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago

But are they cheaper than kids?

[–] leftzero@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 8 months ago

And make better cheese.

[–] Rekonok@sh.itjust.works 44 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I showed this to my daughter and she said that I can barely manage a cat

Can I sell back the goats for another daughter?

[–] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 25 points 8 months ago (1 children)

No but you can sell her for another cat.

[–] Rekonok@sh.itjust.works 9 points 8 months ago
[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You could but you know inflation and something something in this economy and surging pricing...point is it's going to be at least twenty percent more goats.

[–] fkn@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

Or 20% less child...

I don't know if this means the child is younger... Missing more limbs or older...

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 32 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Is that how you measure children?

[–] GunValkyrie@lemmy.world 25 points 8 months ago

It's how he measures goats. Keep up.

[–] Nougat@fedia.io 1 points 8 months ago

Young goats are called "kids."

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 24 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Give the horny mob your daughters so they keep away from the visiting angels.

[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 5 points 8 months ago

But they should write an IOU for you to claim the goats later

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 21 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Ok purely hypothetical here: how many goats are we talking about?

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

5 male goats, 1 male and one female, or two female goats. Your pick

[–] RacerX@lemm.ee 19 points 8 months ago

At least maybe then I'd get some help taking care of the lawn.

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 14 points 8 months ago

"We've been unable to hire staff for our diner at minimum wage because nobody wants to work anymore. How many goats for two waitresses and a dishwasher?"

[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago
[–] Mango@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

WTB goats. Seems like a good investment.

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Especially since you can always make more daughters, goats on the other hand require goats to begin with. Also they don't complain when you tell them to go outside and mow the lawn.

[–] Mango@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Besides, who ever said humans are better than goats? The goats don't complain. Also I can multiply them and trade for teenage girls!

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago

Also when goats get too old you can just have a BBQ and feed them to your teenage girls, but just trying to doing it once the other way around and suddenly you are the bad guy.

[–] profdc9@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

The going rate in goats for a teenage bride is pretty expensive these days though. Don't ask me how I know.

[–] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I’d like to know what the going rate is.

[–] dojan@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago (2 children)

About eight goats and a wheel of cheese.

[–] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 5 points 8 months ago
[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

I am never going to hear the words wheel of cheese again without thinking about Townton

[–] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

Hmmm... I've been struggling to get in touch with last year's lawn service. Goats could indeed come in handy.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

TIL, early Christians were just Libertarians.

[–] Wanderer@lemm.ee 3 points 8 months ago

That girl looks in her 20's