this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2023
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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lonk <- Click for a really fun thread full of cope. Sadly the comments are disabled sadness It's still fun tho! Like check this unironic totally-not-heretical-not-at-all-schism about "chad catholics"

Elsewhere the user is appealing to civil law lmao The pope is the supreme ruler of your religion you dolt, just stay evangelical if you don't like it.

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[–] Grownbravy@hexbear.net 77 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Oh damn, our boy got community noted

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 55 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

walter-yell No don't do it Hank, don't ask a yes/no question with an objective rather than a subjective answer. Don't do it hank you're gonna make yourself into the soyjak, they're gonna reply with a yes and be a chad, don't do it hank noooo walter-breakdown

Best community note so far

[–] Tervell@hexbear.net 63 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

the pope is a dictator who has the authority to exercise unlimited power

Literally the entire point of Catholicism, there was like a big schism about it and everything. Should have become Orthodox instead if you're gonna whine about that.

also holy shit this has got to be one of the funniest community notes of all time:

[–] Judge_Jury@hexbear.net 55 points 1 year ago (2 children)

wojak-nooo nooo I only joined for the esoteric rites you can't just do the rest of Catholicism!!

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 44 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

nooo I only joined for the esoteric rites

Just be orthodox then lmao. Doesn't that faith have like five popes or something? The iconography kicks ass anyway.

[–] Smeagolicious@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago

Bones everywhere - Christianity with necromancer aesthetics

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[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 38 points 1 year ago

40k made it all look based wojak-nooo

[–] VapeNoir@hexbear.net 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Lol no fucking way there was a bishop strickland from texas.

"I sell indulgences and indulgence accessories."

[–] StalinForTime@hexbear.net 34 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)
[–] Crowtee_Robot@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago

With clean burning propane, a new pope will be announced with nothing more than the smell of fresh Texas beef.

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 50 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is what happens when your understanding of history comes from Pepe memes and two and a half hour YouTube videos of guys whose highest level of history was senior year of high school talking about what caused the fall of the Western Roman Empire. It’s all about inventing a tradition to make American culture and politics the direct inheritor of ye olde tyme European Christendom, but then ignores the few dozen schisms and revolutions that were all about getting out from under that.

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 36 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Simon de Montfort would have murdered every trad cath shithead on the internet for heresy

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 46 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I used to be quite churchy, and then when I wasn't and became quite lefty, I honestly felt right at home because both the church and the left splinters into ever expanding subgroups that splinter into even more subgroups at the drop of a hat. It's a weird parallel but it's definitely there

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 58 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Gonna start arguing that Jesus was the first socialist, not because of what he believed, but because of all the schisms he's been the cause of.

[–] SpookyGenderCommunist@hexbear.net 40 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Jesus was a trot, confirmed?! 😳😳😳

[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)
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[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago

The most believable argument yet

[–] M68040@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago

Every now and then I see someone act like infighting and schisms are largely a left politics phenomenon. Oh boy is that ahistorical

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 45 points 1 year ago (3 children)

just stay evangelical if you don't like it

"Bu-but the congregation in Midnight Mass seemed so nice!"

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[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 45 points 1 year ago

These dorks are still mad that the vatican decided that blaming jewish people for literally everything was a bit much

[–] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 41 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Honestly calling the pope an authoritarian dictator of the Vatican city-state would be a good bit

[–] zifnab25@hexbear.net 32 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've heard him described as the perfect Anarcho-Capitalist. He's a supreme dictator of a micro-state whose population is exclusively him.

[–] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 34 points 1 year ago

He's a supreme dictator of a micro-state whose population is exclusively him.

Well, him and a bunch of Pedos so... Yeah, perfect ancap utopia.

[–] CarbonScored@hexbear.net 40 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Your religion is literally that the guy speaks directly with and acts on behalf of the supreme and omnipotent creator of the universe.

"I am a very proud and devout monarchist but it's like, the King's ministers keep doing shit I don't like! Where's the due process?!"

[–] Red_Sunshine_Over_Florida@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I think the "due process" is an artifact of the American (broad L) liberal political tradition they were brought up in.They have yet to jettison it while they move to this Catholic reactionary tradition that rejects all liberal thought post 1789.

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 39 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Dude, apparently the most recent trigger for the removal of the bishop was because he was fucking with finances. Can you even fucking imagine an embezzling bishop genuinely thinking he's holier than the Jesuit Pope who wears an iron cross and named himself after Francis of Assisi? The Pope who has the closest claim to a nomination by God as intended by the church in any recent history? Fuck off!

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[–] M68040@hexbear.net 38 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Poster-Christian theology is so godawful that twenty years of exposure to their shit has permanently alienated me from religion. Just, like, in general.

Fundies say the darndest things. In fact, they never shut the fuck up.

As much shit as there is to be said about the Vatican, the title of Pope at least has qualifications and expectations and that makes him a breath of fresh air next to trad types

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Bring back calling the Pope "the Bishop of Rome"

[–] WoofWoof91@hexbear.net 35 points 1 year ago

prods unknowingly pretending to be catholic will never stop being funny to me

Lmao, fucking dolt, the church recognizes the Pope as the living embodiment of God's word and authority on earth.

[–] Crucible@hexbear.net 30 points 1 year ago

Redoing the Avignon Papacy but this time just for chads

[–] CrispyFern@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago

Reminds me of a conversation with my mom I had when I was ~16:

"I think gay people should be allowed to marry"

"The Pope would disagree with you"

"Well the Pope is wrong"

"You cant call yourself catholic if you think the pope is wrong about stuff"

" ok, then I'm not catholic"

[–] Red_Sunshine_Over_Florida@hexbear.net 27 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

"Due process..." What is this, the high middle aged? They are arguing over the jurisdiction of ecclesiastical courts. They really do want to live in a CK2 savefile when they are trying to replay the Clarendon Constitutions and the whole Investiture Controversy. Gotta keep those tithes in your home county so you can upgrade your ~~swimming pool~~ castle to level 3.

[–] LENINSGHOSTFACEKILLA@hexbear.net 27 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Click for a really fun thread full of cope.

how the fuck did you do that

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

[ :emoji: ] (linktext.gov.org.net)
keep spaces between emoji and square brackets.

[–] Crowtee_Robot@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago

Boy this era's Luther is gonna be hilarious posting

[–] RedundantClam@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago (3 children)
[–] Egon@hexbear.net 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Elsewhere he asks "you think the pope can just order the execution of someone without a fair trial?"

Buddy your faiths doctrine is that he speaks to God. That's the due process. It's fine to not believe that, you're just not a Catholic then.

Crossing my fingers for a Texan antipope

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[–] bazingabrain@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago

Wow these people are fucking idiots lol, thats literally what catholicism is all about, spoiler alert if a genuine liberation theology pope was elected, you losers would HAVE to bend to his will and adjusty your beliefs. Fucking aesthetics converts lol, hilarious.

[–] Alch_Fox@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago

This is what happens when you adopt a religion for aesthetic purposes, lmao. The Pope being the mouthpiece of God is literally one of the core fundamentals of Catholicism. What he says, goes.

[–] LeZero@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If it was some random catholic convert on Twitter, it would be pretty funny, but this is the account of an institute dedicated to the protection of the catholic faith, you'd think some of those motherfuckers would have read book on the subject (you know, papal primacy, kind of a big deal to catholics) but I guess not, you can't make that shit up

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago

If you look at when they were "founded" (2013 the account was made) and the Twitter bio (to protect the Catholic church from enemies outside and within) it really is just a pope Francis reply guy

[–] zifnab25@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Cesare Borgias shouldn't have stopped at Bologna

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

Edited the picture to give it more pixels

[–] TreadOnMe@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

"Soviet-era dictators" still had to run everything by the Supreme Soviet, far more to any degree than any Pope. It is ironically only during the Yeltsin era that the term dictator can be much more easily applied to the Russian system, to horrendous results because nothing ever got done other than large sell-offs of public property and stuff only started functioning again once Putin was able to achieve an actual legislative consensus in the legislature (even if it was from a base of oligarchs).

Stalin was notorious for having far too much stuff go past his desk, but to claim that he was a micro manager on the level of like, Tsar Nicholas is not understanding how Soviet politics actually worked. When it worked well, it was because it was a consensus based process with a firm theoretical grounding based in the founding ideology of Marxist-Leninism. Thing went downhill once the intellectual elites not only disputed the consensus (by fully rejecting Stalin's thought and legacy despite it's general popularity among contemporary Russians) but also, in doing so, completely lost theoretical grounding, deviating into disastrous attempts at left-communism, and then swerving back disastrously into attempts at social democracy.

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