this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2024
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[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 15 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Idk i find like 80% of women i know attractive, its just that i have such confidence problems i dont ask anybody out.

Remember, if you find them attractive that means they're out of your league!

/s

[–] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 12 hours ago

That's been something hard about transitioning, being aware of how fewer and fewer people find me attractive the further I go. Ah well, it's not like I was going to find a partner anyways, looks really never came into play in the first place.

[–] Juice260@lemmy.world 36 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I feel like this meme was made by a gen z kid that grew up with filtered pictures being normal

[–] dabaldeagul@feddit.nl 1 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I'm gen z but my problem is mostly that I tend to be attracted to my friends more... Which kinda limits the pool. Whoops.

[–] CandleTiger@programming.dev 2 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

It limits the pool for sure but when it works it works real good. Good luck to you.

[–] dabaldeagul@feddit.nl 1 points 5 minutes ago

True, so far it hasn't really worked out though. And it also makes it much harder to get over someone. In the end I'll probably find someone but with a lot of hurt along the way before I do, I imagine.

[–] HeyJoe@lemmy.world 22 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Over the years of talking with my wife about who we find attractive, she has realized I find almost all women attractive in some ways and normally the ones that are supposed to be attractive i find less attractive. She hated this realization because she applied it to herself, and it made her feel bad... I just find the good in most people, that's all!

[–] Pacattack57@lemmy.world 14 points 12 hours ago

There’s a coworker of mine that when the topic arises and he gets asked what is his preference (in terms of the types of women he likes) his response is “women” 😂

[–] CyberEgg@discuss.tchncs.de 102 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Now try finding someone you find attractive and who also finds you attractive in return (it's impossible).

[–] quafeinum@lemmy.world 3 points 1 hour ago

AND who is equally kinky

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 2 points 8 hours ago

That's the boat I'm in, except that I'm also gay and the popular trend is poligamy. :) Fml

[–] flamingo_pinyata@sopuli.xyz 36 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) (8 children)

I did a calculation once about my chances of finding a compatible long-term partner, inspired by the Drake Equation and using many many assumptions. The numbers are not good: ~22 out of 8 billion.

[–] Tehdastehdas@lemmy.world 4 points 3 hours ago

Wouldn't be a problem if someone took dating as seriously as Skyscanner takes flight tickets.

[–] Atlas_@lemmy.world 11 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

That seems absurdly low. Are you sure that all of your criteria are non-negotiable? And entirely uncorrelated?

[–] flamingo_pinyata@sopuli.xyz 9 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Look I wasn't completely serious about it, there's no way to actually calculate something like that.
For example what's the fraction of people that find me attractive. It could range from 0.05 to 0.5. I have no way of knowing.

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

You could work backwards from successful marriage counts.

[–] Zron@lemmy.world 25 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

As a married man, I gotta say you’re probably selling yourself short or have unrealistic expectations of a partner.

Remember that whoever you’re going to date is a person, not a robot. People are not quantifiable. One day they may be a dick, the next they may be pleasant. Some people are willing to compromise and others aren’t. Man, woman, or other, it doesn’t matter. If you’re not willing to compromise something, you’re never going to find someone.

[–] Scubus@sh.itjust.works 1 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Post pic or be assumed attractive

[–] LesserAbe@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

This is weenie shit

[–] WarTowel@lemmy.world 30 points 22 hours ago

So you're saying there's a chance

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 14 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Yall need to lower your expectations god damn

[–] flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

I like reminding my single friends that 73% of Americans are considered overweight. 41% are obese.

A shocking amount of my male friends are overweight or obese and refuse to date overweight women.

[–] nomy@lemmy.zip 1 points 3 hours ago

We could all lose a few pounds but sharing a meal is a huge thing, take that thicc person out and enjoy meal with another human being you animals. You might even find you have some commonality and you'll feel slightly less isolated when the meal is done.

[–] recklessengagement@lemmy.world 6 points 20 hours ago

I'm curious about the math you did to come to that final number

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 6 points 20 hours ago

I only need to make 1 assumption to solve that equation for me

0% of people would find me attractive

QE fucking D

[–] Emi@ani.social 40 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm bi myself and a shut in. How do you find people in general I don't know.

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 45 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

From what I understand if you just stay in front of the computer that they will magically manifest inside your home.

[–] Emi@ani.social 27 points 23 hours ago

Amazing, I'll just keep doing that thanks.

[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 11 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

I've heard that it also goes faster if you complain about women being evil and stupid on the computer.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 11 points 22 hours ago

When you find a (rare!) female online, you must protect her at all costs. She will be surrounded by ne'er-do-wells and men of ill-intent. You are her knight. She is your lady. You must never doubt yourself in this. Nature will take its course.

That's when you start negging her.

[–] stinky@redlemmy.com 46 points 1 day ago (2 children)

now imagine being gay and the dating pool is 90% smaller.

[–] WalrusDragonOnABike@reddthat.com 44 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Be ace and the dating pool is 100% smaller.

[–] Krafting@lemmy.world 32 points 1 day ago

Be me and the dating pool is 200% smaller.

[–] stinky@redlemmy.com 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 17 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I swear this has the opposite effect. In more than one instance, I've told someone I'm ace and it's made them more persistent, like they're thinking 'Oh, I can fix that.' No, I assure you, you can't. Please stop. :(

[–] LostXOR@fedia.io 10 points 22 hours ago

Pull the reverse card on them and treat their attraction like it's something that needs fixing: "Oh, you're attracted to me? I'm so sorry to hear that! Have you tried therapy?"

[–] FoxyFerengi@lemm.ee 4 points 23 hours ago

I miss acedatespace. There's acespace.love, but that's more like people shouting into the void than an actual dating site.

[–] boreengreen@lemm.ee 8 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

If you like each other and you share most values, there is your partner. If your partner is good looking as well; great for you guys!

[–] Nojustice@lemmy.ml 16 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

Ah the classic "date someone I don't find attractive", a famously stable long term strategy. We'll just ignore that whole critical issue of intimacy. Right right right.

[–] GrammarPolice@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Nojustice@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 hours ago (1 children)
[–] GrammarPolice@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

No please. Anything but that😢

[–] slackassassin@sh.itjust.works 7 points 15 hours ago

Ya, the meme is trash, but attraction is important. It may evolve or surprise you, but it is relevant.

[–] n3cr0@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

The upper one depicts the guys around me. I can go through the lower one, but the result is usually this.