Doctor asked me if I was pregnant. I laughed and said no. He was very serious and asked if I was sure.
Sir. I have a penis. There is no uterus. Always a nice feeling to pass, I guess.
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Doctor asked me if I was pregnant. I laughed and said no. He was very serious and asked if I was sure.
Sir. I have a penis. There is no uterus. Always a nice feeling to pass, I guess.
This happens every time I go to the doctor, you'd think they'd remember
had this happen a number of times to me, I think the most awkward was trying to explain to a nurse in Montreal with my awful French.
even more fucked up that i have to go to work now my wife is literally at home
Your workplace should let you take your puppy to work
Puppy needs to sleep fuck off
Next time a zoomer hits on me I'll scare em off by telling them I had a blockbuster card as an adult
Oh wait this wouldn't work on the types that are into Mommys that I attract like moths to the flame, this would only make things worse
cw: vent about life
It really sucks being poor and not being able to get a job. I have no money to go and do things, I don't have a car or any way to get around so even if I had money to do things I still wouldn't be able to, I am stuck in a meh housing arrangement, and I'm lonely as ever because social anxiety is strong and I shut down in even the smallest social interactions. I'm a mess.
trans lit professor asked me yesterday "is that lenin on your shirt" (it was, in fact, lenin on my shirt)
i am very curious about how that conversation would go with her honestly
cw: trans community drama, anti-diyism
whats goin on over there
god im so glad i never look at reddit anymore
cont. cw: trans community drama, anti-diyism on reddit
spoiler
wow its almost like theres a place where you dont have to worry about what spez fucking thinks
Wow I'm actially impressed that even at my older age my parents are able to make me so insecure about my body -.-
is flirting just trying to make the other person laugh and have a good time and sexual innuendos?
is that it?
In my experience itβs also about making the other person feel good and loved by giving them thoughtful compliments and your total attention
misgendering
I know I had to wear my large sweater because it's so cold outside, but I walk in multiple times every week, surely you know it's not "thanks, man" by now
transphobia, transmeds
I don't often doomscroll through bigoted spaces any more, and when I do I think it's mostly just funny to see their unhinged takes, but I stumbled on a transmed forum today and that shit genuinely made me sad. It's infuriating that people who have 100% suffered from gender policing decides they're now going to start gender policing others. I hadn't really looked into transmed beliefs before and now I regret knowing these people exist.
But also, I can't imagine these people are very happy. Like, they're treating this idea of "opposite sex neurology" as if it's an unquestionably true scientific fact and rely on it to feel valid (i saw someone asking if they could get a brainscan to prove they're trans lol), while the actual scientific reality is that we don't know what causes people to be trans. And why does it even matter? If you need to transition to live a fulfilled and happy life, isn't that reason enough? Why is your internal sense of self not enough to make you valid.
Also wanted to claw my eyes out when people were posting "teens shouldn't get gender affirming care" and "going through female puberty has ruined me forever" right next to each other.
Y'all ever try to do something gender affirming and it backfires? Lol
Spent all afternoon shaving, doing makeup, putting on an outfit just for fun. Not happy with what I see in the mirror. I feel worse than before I did it
Anyway, the diffuser worked, and my hair looks great~
Edit: a couple hours have passed and now I'm happy I did it
Would recommend
Stutters are really cute to me, dunno what the deal is.
Weird way to air out the fact you think is cute
you unlock this after beating all 326 routes, last story and expert mode in shadow the hedgehog 05. I've done it so y'all can believe me
I'm not much of a dysphoria poster, but...
dysphoria question
Does anyone have any methods for managing/coping with dysphoria? I can't transition any faster. I've already got girl clothes, people using my pronouns, voice training, hair removal, and a plan to start HRT.
It's just that it's been very acute lately on a visual level. I'm about to adopt @Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 's strategy of never looking in a mirror, but... I'm like super vain and can't pass a mirror without looking lol
Anyway, it just hurts, and I'm solution oriented, so I just kind of want to do something about it
preening
Found my favorite undies that had been missing in the back of the drawer and wearing them with my Good Ass Pants and feeling like I'm channeling potent bottom aura
cishet women considering a man, doing the bare minimum for child care, sexy need help asap. they are not okay
It's ridiculous, the bar is on the fucking floor. God bless these poor benighted cishet women for having to date cishet men. Imagine thinking your partner is above and beyond because he "babysits" his kid and eats you out every once in a while and washes the dishes sometimes - and being right that this is above and beyond in their romantic experiences
eats you out
nsfw
eating pussy is the bare minimum you should do as a cisman jfc, you barely do anything else atleast put that useless tongue to use
overall the only good place for cishet man is on their knees in chains
Everything I own is transitioning with me. I've noticed I use she/her for all of my inanimate belongings now
shout out t4t
I think modern halloween is one of the dubs America can have. that shit is fun, and there's a reason it has caught on all over the place. my dad refused to take me trick or treating as a kid calling it American shit, so I had to get neighbour to take me with their kids, and it was damn fun every time
venting about irl organising
its realy nothingey, it's just negative
I turn my back while some people who seemingly had the right idea got into positions of power, and I put my hand up to fill a role after someone bailed mid term. It turns out the so-called-anarchists have been encouraging general membership to write articles, cool, cute idea. But I look at them, and they're poorly researched, have no analysis, meandering, nothingey, and just wrong, filled with racist assumptions. Is anarchy just when you can't tell people NO? the article this person wanted published when I came back was essentially titled "we need to make people love the country again", and it's fascist as fuck. omg (I know these people aren't actually anarchists, they're just young libs trying their best, maybe I shouldn't have dipped)
Don't even get me started on people bailing 1 month before the end of their term and suggesting we should just fold the org. I get your burnt out but OH MY FUCKING GOD. please excuse me while I scream FUCK as loudly as I can in my home.
One of the most frustrating things is that the bar for entry is so low that a bunch of unsafe "comrades" who are anti-communists, who I have kept out of other spaces, are now firmly embedded, and they complain that kicking people out is going to isolate them from community, and they'll make vague threats of self-harm, yeah cool, that's not abusive, this is fine.
Honestly everytime I stop smoking feels like the worst possible time to be doing it. I know this is all petty and silly, but wow I am just having a bad mental health week/month/year/life
No amount of easy listening will sooth my soul today comrades, this is a clusterfuck.
weird? idk, dysphoria
It's weird how something that isn't outwardly visible to anyone else can alter my mood and behavior significantly
Wearing cute undies and I feel kinda bubbly and more femmy than usual compared to my usual dour cranky sleep deprived grandparent vibe
I wish I wasn't a garish oaf and had somewhere fun to be because meeting a cute person to flirt with IRL sounds appealing today
Being told saying that saying holding hands is is a played out joke is disheartening. Who said I was joking those are some of the best dreams I've had
This tuck tape fucking rocks, I can swim again
Can't go to the bathroom with it cause it ain't sticky, but sacrifices must be made to wear a one piece
gendered language musing? Idk workshopping, indirectly flirty
"Good girl"
"Good boy"
"Good... bee?" π
(idk I kinda think "bee" as short for enby sounds cute)
dysphoria
I have come to realize that I am significantly more affected by dysphoria than I thought. I realized how much of a prison guyness feels like and how much I hate feeling like one. I feel like I'm always a little bit aware of what I look like and what I sound like and it makes human interaction feel so much harder.
kinda sadposting
Really fighting the i am fundamentally unwantable thoughts today . Literally only because I felt awkward earlier while at a friends place and now im just holding back the flood of thoughts and ruminations and anxieties. I just want to be comfortable with my friends, but ive got too many maladaptive processes, and my maladaptive processes dont interface well with everyone elses (i guess thats part of why their maladaptive now and not just adaptive anymore...).
spoiler entertaining my ruminations
I have a really deep seated belief that i am unwantable . That any expression of wanting to be around me is a lie, or intended to be deceptive. I know its not true, but, well, under duress we regress . And when im stressed or anxious or feel awkward my ability to counter that thought goes out the window. Like its not even a thought, its axiomatic . And i cant seem to do anything about it! Im aware of it, i try to counter it by ignoring it, by ignoring my discomfort, but it never goes away, and I dont know what steps to take to change that process.
People ask me about it sometimes, but i just and tell them its nothing, im fine; I dont want to make my friends deal with my weird shit. Like, when im in these spaces I require an explicit "i want to spend time with you and will be sad if you leave " (yes the hug is included in the quotes, i require hugs) in order to not feel bad guilty and shameful for existing near my friends. But they shouldnt have to say that; i should be able to understand "feel free to hang out if you want" actually is an invitation, and not a thinly veiled attempt to get me to leave.
Fuck my brain
Here is a portrait I drew of me and my brain:
So got these sour noodles at the dollar store, vegan as far as I can tell and they taste pretty great.