this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2024
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chapotraphouse
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It's Bob The Bear, hello Bob.
Does that look like the face of mercy?
"I don't mean to alarm you, but someone has shat on the porch"
They who sat it shat it.
bears, including grizzlies, were medium-sized predators in pleistocene north america. there were at least four more formidable predators until like 10K years ago; the reason they seem silly for apex predators is that we killed the real ones
The biggest one of these was the short-faced bear, and i wouldn't be surprised if they looked even sillier.
yeah if polar bears are still cute shortfaces could probably have managed
I do wonder whether smilodon was cute in some small and unexpected way. probably.
I'd think so, given how jaguars look when they want cuddles. Jaguars are fucking terrifying, they're all muscle and skull-cracking jaws, but there's times when they're just really large and powerful kittens. I'm sure the sabretooths looked really goofy with at least some of their facial expressions, not just Smilodon or the other sabretooth felines. Can't help but wonder how possum-like Thylocosmilus was in some moments.
I like giant ground sloths. They just wanna eat leaves all day, but will absolutely kill you just as fast as a bear. Those scientists gotta get the cloning vats running.
Fine, you can have a chicken nugget
bears are guys
Bros got the gamer posture.
That's how they catch their prey