this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2024
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[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 133 points 2 months ago (6 children)

I'm such a man that I've had sex that my penis resembles an angel hair pasta noodle made of veiny leather. I'm such a sex laden stud that I can fuck any crevice now. I've reached peaked masculinity by being able to top any nook or cranny. Behold and be shamed.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 73 points 2 months ago

The couch beckons, Vance

[–] MrMcGasion@lemmy.world 44 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I'll be impressed when you that down to a subatomic size so you can fuck a solid block of steel because your penis fits in the space between the atoms.

[–] modifier@lemmy.ca 26 points 2 months ago

Tunnnnghsten baby

[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago

Mine can split atoms. Very explosive climax.

[–] prex@aussie.zone 35 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Wanna see my downstairs mixup?

[–] BigFatNips@sh.itjust.works 29 points 2 months ago

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

[–] hate2bme@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

I started with a little peen and was still able to pleasure women.

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 2 points 2 months ago

I use mine to scrape crumbs out of my keyboard.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 64 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

As a Transfem I would prefer not to have it at all :3

(Also im Ace, I'm not waiting for "the right person", I'm playing Fallout New Vegas and enjoying being alone)

[–] RageAgainstTheRich@lemmy.world 31 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Just have a lot of sex and it will literally shave itself thin. Then in the end you can just snap it off like a twig. Trust me.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That sounds horrific, I think I'll just get bottom surgery

[–] aBundleOfFerrets@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

I mean that’s the method they use, thats why you are under anesthesia (they don’t use real people though)

[–] lady_maria@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Are you enjoying FNV? Is it your first time playing it?

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 2 months ago (2 children)

First playthrough, if you have any mod recommendations it would be very appreciated :3 (I just started an I'm willing to restart)

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

https://vivanewvegas.moddinglinked.com/

There’s a lot there and if you are just going for the vanilla experience I’d recommend just installing the utilities and bug fixes mod categories (just follow the guide until you wrap up the “base finish” section”), but generally that’s an accepted list to truly make your NV experience excellent

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] kautau@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Well yes Jessica, I wouldn't have said "an accepted list" if I shared something that wasn't up to date or I would have been internet wrecked

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I should have said "well maintained," as in "unlikely to be abandoned out of the blue." Also, who is this "Jessica" you speak of? That's totally not me :3

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Makes sense Jessica. I’ll be sure not to call you Jessica again, Jessica

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] kautau@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sure thing! New Vegas is my absolute favorite game of all time so feel free to ask questions

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Do you have a guide that works on Linux :3

(I use Arch btw)

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

This is specifically for the steam deck, but the instructions shouldn’t be that far off

https://gist.github.com/richardgaywood/e64eeb162062adb501fd3d35add9a0e8

[–] Theme@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 months ago

I'm so jealous, New Vegas is my favourite game, I wish I could recapture that first play through vibe

[–] NaevaTheRat@vegantheoryclub.org 50 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's quite simple. One die can shape many blanks but each time a workpiece goes through a die it is drawn down and loses some mass.

Repeated cold working also tends to embrittle the workpiece, so without extensive annealing (foreplay) a penis will become brittle and snap off.

[–] mipadaitu@lemmy.world 39 points 2 months ago (2 children)

That's why I heat treat and anneal my dong every dozen uses. It takes a good 6 hours to get it up to temperature safely, but then letting it heat soak for 20 hours is the real annoying part.

But after my third replacement, I think it's worth it.

[–] bangsnooter@lemmy.zip 27 points 2 months ago

I could listen to you guys talk genital smithing for hours.

You got a podcast or something?

[–] remotelove@lemmy.ca 10 points 2 months ago

Don't you still have problems with material migration? After a few hundred cycles, my dong still has good crystalline structure but looks like someone punched a doughnut.

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Does it work with masturbation? If yes, then I might deliberately have to keep myself debuffed, otherwise I'd be too big for most people.

[–] shasta@lemm.ee 16 points 2 months ago

Depends on grip strength

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Does it work with masturbation?

The reverse, actually. Masturbation builds up the vital muscles of the pubis and grant improved agility as well as a higher stopping power during ejaculation.

[–] Toribor@corndog.social 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Gotta brag about how shriveled up my wang is from all the action. It's like a Slim Jim, positively haunted.

[–] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 15 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

This needs to become a modern day chick tract. Print up tons of this meme & leave them in truck stop bathrooms across the country!

You can follow it up with one about how Viagra will make hair grow on your palms!

[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The last thing I'd want to do is inadvertently fuel a new complex for incels about how women are out to shrink their penises.

[–] HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

lol, I don’t think most incels could find a truck stop if they wanted too. There aren’t any to stop at along the way between their rage boners & their keyboards…

I wanna fuel a new complex within the religious right! Now that crowd values a truck stop!

[–] MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 months ago

That's why they call me, "needle-dick the bug fucker"! 😎

[–] Adramis@midwest.social 11 points 2 months ago

Drow matriarchs be like:

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemm.ee 8 points 2 months ago

this wouldnt work it would just turn into a contest to use penis shriveled the most

[–] stebo02@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 months ago

this is exactly why I'm still a virgin

For a minute I thought the right one was just a cheeto

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago (2 children)

The vagina stretching thing would only happen if the woman had successively larger penises entering each time, so if she had a lot of sex with multiple partners who all had the same penile girth, it should remain the same relative size.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 11 points 2 months ago

Have you been fucking play doh again?

[–] CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com -5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I don't think that's true. Vaginas stretch out with use. You are right that if the dicks kept getting bigger, they would stretch it more, but the same sized dick can absolutely stretch out a pussy over time. My anecdotal evidence is having a sexual relationship with someone who's pussy was so tight it hurt sometimes, stopped being so tight over time, then we stopped talking for like 6 months and when we had sex again she was almost as tight as the first time we had sex.

[–] Promethiel@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Lad, women are tenser at first fucking's because, in theory, you're both getting used to each other and what most turns on the machinery of arousal. They tend to feel smoother, slicker, and downright hungrily pulling, when a woman is most aroused. You are self owning a tad bit to any one who knows how to lay a proper lovin'.

[–] CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com 2 points 2 months ago

It can be slick and pulling in while also squeezing so tight that it hurts. They aren't mutually exclusive