this post was submitted on 19 Apr 2024
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Privacy
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A place to discuss privacy and freedom in the digital world.
Privacy has become a very important issue in modern society, with companies and governments constantly abusing their power, more and more people are waking up to the importance of digital privacy.
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Relationships (of all kinds) are about compromise. You have to recognize that outside of the echo chambers in communities like this one, literally nobody cares about digital privacy to the extent that us nerds do. So you can choose to be dogmatic in your approach and alienate yourself from the >99% of people in the world who don't care, or you can recognize that your own desires for digital privacy need to be weighed against your desires to form meaningful connections with other people.
Personally I prefer to be pragmatic in my approach. I do what I can to look after my privacy within the constraints of actually doing what I need to do to connect with other people. That's why I made this post. My mind is made up that I'm going to at least try to use WeChat, but within that constraint, I want to do everything in my control to limit the app's visibility into the rest of my system.
Exactly. As I have understood, she is not willing to use an other messaging app. It seems as if only you are ready to have a compromise.
This is not "not caring to that extent". This is not even just not caring at all. This is straight out ignoring and nullifying any and all concerns of one of the parties over privacy, by the other one.
The only dogmatic thing here would be to say "only matrix", or "only signal", or whatever. As I understand you have attempted to offer multiple options.
It's mostly irrelevant if they care about it. In a healthy relationship no one is The Boss whose decisions must be accepted. Instead if one party does not care about something, but the other very much does, they can accept that and live with it, if that's not a terrible choice. For example if your wife does not want to eat meat, would you force them to do so, because you don't want to deal with making meatless meals? I often eat meat, but I would be ready to give it up regularly doing so if need be. Or if they don't want to deal with the selfhosted media store, ok, fine, let her keep her Netflix subscription. This however, is not about pleasures, but about giving up or not human rights important to me.
In this situation however, it sounds like as if your girlfriend with be "The Boss"