this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2024
718 points (96.5% liked)
me_irl
4700 readers
280 users here now
All posts need to have the same title: me_irl it is allowed to use an emoji instead of the underscore _
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Definitely not true.
But the issue here is so deep that it is hard to explain.
First, obviously, if someone doesn't care to give back that relationship isn't worth your time anyway. But you probably know.
Second, when you are there for others but not entirely there from your own base of security, it is received as a temporary interaction, no matter if it is a pleasant or "profitable" interaction
Third, when you get back from a relationship, when they freely give to you, you probably can not fully identify that it has happened, and when you prompt yourself constantly for if you get enough you don't have proof. So to expand on this one, you need to be super conscious about if it just feels like you are forgotten but in reality you have been appreciated and praised but it slipped off you.
You will never receive enough energy attention and love by struggling for it. This is because you never control others, and if you manage to do that, it will be truly just sabotaging any possible real unconditional friendship or love.
You can just give from your side, be so secure in yourself that you have the ability to evaluate objectively if you want to have the relationship if it doesn't really give you joy in life