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I don't think that's a fair reading of what they said at all

Gender is indeed irrelevant at all times. It doesn't exist. It's a set of expectations you impose on another person and have imposed on you... Realizing I don't have to explain anything to anyone is my personal answer, I just need to stop forcing myself to pretend.

Gender roles exist, but only to people who believe in them. You can break them at any time. You don't need a category, you can just be you, moment to moment.

I can't think of a more accepting position for non-binary or genderfluid people... Some people need external validation, but ultimately it's about how you see yourself