this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2023
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Mental Health

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It's been almost 8 months since I graduated Uni. No one wants to hire a student with no experience. Been living in my parents basement for all that time. Been working nearly every single day trying to better myself for a job to no avail. Been drowning in debt for nearly 10 years. Mom hasn't been able to work due to health problems. Dad just diagnosed with the worst possible disease you can think about so he can't work. It all falls to me to work. Family had to resort to a social assistance to pay the basics requirement for bills. Owe Sister and aunts money. All my friends have moved away or too busy to talk or do anything. Last meaningful relationship, which entails just talking and doing nothing more, was about 5 years ago. And no matter what I do, who I turn to for help, how much I kill myself trying to get a job, how much I try to better this situation, it all ends up with another rejection email, another message left on read, another email with no response, and more debt that I can never repay back.

Yeah, I get why villains want to destroy the world in movies. The world sucks, everyone sucks, there's no good people in this world. Miracles don't exist, dreams are just imaginary, everyone doesn't care about you or what you're going through.

And like everything else I've tried doing to help, this won't get any attention. It seems like the universe forgot I existed or just made me to torment me. Because it just seems that I'm just a shadow in a dark place.

Forgotten and alone.

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