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I realized too late in my life that friendships of any kind or flavor all have a lifespan. This can mean anything, five minutes in line at the movies, childhood into high school, a semester of college, or your whole life.
Context: the friends I’ve (m35) had since childhood and into my adulthood have slowly and silently withered away due a multitude of reasons but mostly because we each have things going on in our life and those had taken precedence over cultivating and caring for our friendships. Sure we text for holidays or birthdays, but it all feels hollow compared to what we had together for literal decades.
Friendships fading away are very painful.
The slow, but sure, withering itself wasn’t painful, but after having a phone call with my friends and realizing that were I stood in their life was no longer even their priority, or on a level where they might actually care if I disappeared it wouldn’t matter or cause any alarm. Which is more sad imho than just not knowing.