this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2023
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Asklemmy
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Man, I too would like to have a community gathering place, but the local church is super elitist and the priest is a conservative dickhead, so while I would have imagined that churches would not be like that, many alienate potential community members :/
Try looking into the Unitarian, Episcopal or United Church if Christ as all three tend to be more progressive if you want a community that is likely to not be as conservative. The Episcopal church, of the three, is more likely to have a conservative element as it was the "elite" denomination for centuries.
I'd love for people to understand that depending on your area, there might be multiple churches and its really a process of trial and error to find the right fit. Personally, non-denominational is the way to go and it helps if they have a good, modern worship section with cool instruments and a decent stage. I say this because its often representative of their approach to everything else, the more modern, generallly, the better.
This extends to their attitudes towards diversity (racially speaking) and tolerance towards LGBTQ+. I don't want to get into identity politics because its a distraction and unnecessary to anything, particularly religious belief and functioning in the modern world.
Your church, like you, should not give a fuck who takes what body part where for sexual gratification or where one's attractions lay, as long as it is truly and deeply consensual and its is not radically legally barred like with animals and children. I am not associating those latter two things to the former designations, a gay person or trans person can be entirely moral and logically consistent and valuable in the eyes of whoever or whatever god is for all poetic and practical intents.
Likewise with race, it is retarded to care avout what someone's skin color or ethnic background is as long as they are peaceful and conduct themselves in a way that they are not corrosive to the society in question. It should not cost the people native to a place to accomodate the existence of that from another, particularly whenever it involves violent injury or displacement.
It is not wrong to require varying levels of scrutiny based on where someone came from for the reason that a culture and birth place, geographically speaking, has baggage and influences one's attitude toward peaceful conduct and respect for bodily integrity and integrity of one's holistic being. Cultures that are intolerant and deny the humanity and worthiness of others cannnot stand and should not be tolerated, not even a little bit. They must be allowed (and I would argue, even facillitated into) drive(ing) themselves into extinction and it is moral to allow them to do so while safeguarding one own society and private existence.
Having said all that, my original advice stands. As well, I wish more people would believe people when they show and tell who they are. You've correctly assessed the nature of the priest and you are likely correct to avoid him and that which he represents. If you can drive and there are other churches around somewhere, I would suggest you check those out. But there are also virtual services offered by many churches and if I can do so without doxxing myself, I will think on how to help you with that. But in person for fellowship and involvement in the community are foundational to the experience and I would implore you to be creative and find a way to find a good place and to make it possible to attend directly.
Please take care and I'll try to help any way I can.