there's no getting through to them that we didn't make their kid gay or trans or whatever, they're just shitty parents unworthy of trust.

One of my shitty relatives is a high school teacher, and recently was bragging to other family members about how there's, "none of that «synonym for automobile transmission that's also a slur» bullshit at MY school!"

You not being aware of transgender kids existing isn't the weird flex you think it is. It means that your students don't feel safe around you.