Trans

948 readers

139 users here now

General trans community.

Rules:

Follow all blahaj.zone rules
All posts must be trans-related. Other queer-related posts go to c/lgbtq.
Don't post negative, depressing news articles about trans issues unless there is a call to action or a way to help.

Resources:

Best resource: https://github.com/cvyl/awesome-transgender Site with links to resources for just about anything.

Trevor Project: crisis mental health services for LGBTQ people, lots of helpful information and resources: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

The Gender Dysphoria Bible: useful info on various aspects of gender dysphoria: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en

StainedGlassWoman: Various useful essays on trans topics: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/

Trans resources: https://trans-resources.info/

[USA] Resources for trans people in the South: https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/#provider-map

[USA] Report discrimination: https://action.aclu.org/legal-intake/report-lgbtqhiv-discrimination

[USA] Keep track on trans legislation and news: https://www.erininthemorning.com/

[GERMANY] Bundesverband Trans: Find medical trans resources: https://www.bundesverband-trans.de/publikationen/leitfaden-fuer-behandlungssuchende/

[GERMANY] Trans DB: Insurance information (may be outdated): https://transdb.de/

[GERMANY] Deutsche Gesellschaft für Transidentität und Intersexualität: They have contact information for their advice centers and some general information for trans and intersex people. They also do activism: dgti.org

*this is a work in progress, and these resources are courtesy of users like you! if you have a resource that helped you out in your trans journey, comment below in the pinned post and I'll add here to pass it on

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone

EmilyIsTrans@lemmy.blahaj.zone

Xenia@lemmy.blahaj.zone

onevia@lemmy.blahaj.zone

kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone

Why did people think it was bad that I identified as male online so I could be gay? (lemmings.world)

submitted 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) by CatDemons4@lemmings.world to c/trans@lemmy.blahaj.zone

27 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I’m comfortable being a woman with my lady parts. I also like to pretend. I told people I was male (transmasc, specifically) so that I could freely experience attraction to just men without having the “straight” label.

Whatever I was, I did NOT want to be straight, so presenting as a trans guy helped me feel better about myself. I could be a gay man. Then, I was a non-binary demiboy (either gay or bi but would only date men).

I felt like a girl in real life. I still do. I didn’t feel dysphoria nor a desire to transition in any way, neither socially nor physically nor anything. It just felt relieving to be a gay trans guy, but that still made me trans even though I didn’t identify as male nor did I ever see myself as male, right?

(I see myself as a woman and always have, I don’t have dysphoria. I identify as a woman who wants a penis. I think I’m moreso attracted to the idea of having male parts than actually seeing myself as a guy, but like I said, it relieved me to be gay and not straight.)

long story short, I’m a woman slightly attracted to the idea of herself being a trans guy or having a penis.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] fracture@beehaw.org 3 points 8 hours ago

when ppl pretend to be a gender online because of comfort, it seems to me that they feel more comfortable as that gender

i would do some real reflection about this. you talk about gender dysphoria but you don't make any mention of gender euphoria. do you know what that is? it's the other set of traits to look for when considering if you're trans. one of those is feeling more comfortable in a given gender than your assigned gender at birth. another is feeling a sense of wholeness or happiness when picturing yourself with different sexual characteristics. sometimes that also presents as feeling sexually aroused when picturing yourself with those traits

why did you want to avoid being straight so badly?

i think online spaces are good places for exploring your gender identity and i don't really think it was wrong or disingenuous. you feel like it was, because it's pretend for you, but it's offering you a real sense of warmth and comfort, so i don't see an issue. obviously, please treat the trust that other people may grant you, given that label, with care. be a good person with it, and if they become close to you, consider explaining your situation to them, before misunderstandings can happen

identities are free to take and wear as you please. you don't owe anyone dysphoria or a desire to transition to be trans, or to be that identity everywhere at all times. it's just seems to me that you identify as a man/demiboy/etc online, and that's cool