this post was submitted on 12 Dec 2024
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    [–] TheDemonBuer@lemmy.world 88 points 2 weeks ago (10 children)

    Pfft, Linux users don't date. We're all virginal, paranoid shut-ins.

    [–] josefo@leminal.space 52 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    The trick is securing a marriage before using Linux, if try the other way around it doesn't work.

    [–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 31 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

    Shortly after getting my steam deck and seriously learning Linux past tiny personal servers, I got divorced

    [–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 week ago

    I know correlation ≠ causation, but I really want to believe your relationship was ruined because your wife was sneaking out in the middle of the night to use Windows

    [–] z3rOR0ne@lemmy.ml 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

    I don't know. I'm pretty sure one of the many ways you can end a marriage is installing Gentoo and saying "I'm just gonna go and compile my kernel." to your significant other, then go to your computer and just never be heard from again.

    [–] lime@feddit.nu 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)
    [–] Marthirial@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

    Can confirm this works. Windows user thru single life. Married, switched to Linux on my laptop. Now separated and life in ruins but a smile always sneaks in booting up Kubuntu.

    [–] TimeSquirrel@kbin.melroy.org 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

    That's what Anthrocon is for. Once a year is enough.

    [–] pixelscript@lemm.ee 6 points 1 week ago

    And if that isn't enough, I know a few good dakimakura shops.

    [–] superkret@feddit.org 16 points 1 week ago

    I don't date because women are proprietary.
    You can share them with the community, but you can't modify and use them in any way you like.

    [–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    Yeah, ikr? My wife won't even bang me, and I'm fairly sure it's part of a global conspiracy to make my balls explode

    [–] superkret@feddit.org 13 points 1 week ago

    sudo touch wife

    southsamurai isn't in the sudoers file. This incident will be reported.

    [–] bumbali@lemmynsfw.com 2 points 1 week ago

    i have the same situation. i figured i could have sex with someone else then, but other women seem to also know i use linux because nobody else will bang me either. and i doubt it's my looks, mom says i'm handsome, so it has to be the linux stuff.

    [–] toynbee@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

    I dated and married.

    I love the story of how I met my now-wife. It was on IRC. When I was trying to start to meet women, I never would have guessed that that would be how I met my future wife.

    [–] pmarcilus@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

    A keeper, and u should be a good husband to her.

    Btw, let me fetch some grasses outside first

    [–] toynbee@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

    I'm not sure I'm succeeding, but I'm trying hard to be good to her. She's the best person I know.

    Last time I touched grass, I hyperextended my already injured ankle. I'm super tentative about that kind of thing now.

    The types for significant others and distros hash to the same location in the table, it's just bad luck and there's nothing we can do about it.

    A lot of us are also disaster trans lesbians :3

    [–] acockworkorange@mander.xyz 3 points 1 week ago

    Deep_in_ the basement, amirite?

    [–] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

    Hey. I go outside every now and then...

    [–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

    We should hang out.

    But, like ... Inside.

    [–] morrowind@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 week ago

    And this meme here is showing one of the reasons why