this post was submitted on 25 Nov 2024
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To be furiously myself.
Of course there's "how do you define yourself" but I discover it every day and it changes spectrally every few weeks (it better) so my definition is wrong over and over again. And I'm right over and over again too. Am I drunk?
It's hard to define in words, since words lose meaning and are imperfect when they leave your mouth.
But I feel well-defined when I turn a gun game into a tea party. Or a tea party into a gun game.
When I stay up wake to grab an extra bite of time, or when I do jack shit to stare at cool red cirrus clouds. I'm defined when I fuck up but bite my way up the wall into a standing position.
When I write something down and look back at it later -- "wow, I was smart" or "wow, I was braindead" -- then do it again.
Decorate my room, or make my lock screen pretty, or reanimate a useless skill.
I'm only a little opinionated though. If I download a personality, that's still me. If I 180, that's still me. If I'm dead wrong and eat advice, that's still me.
I'm not gonna carpe diem into a crime spree but my time is fucking mine so fuck everything (romantically/derogatorily)