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when and how did you know you were gay? (lemm.ee)

submitted 4 weeks ago by yoshisaur@lemm.ee to c/gay@lemmy.world

10 comments fedilink hide all child comments

mine was when i was 13. i always thought one of my friends in middle school was good looking…too good looking. a month later we had a sleepover and he took his shirt and shorts off to change… and that confirmed it. side note, did anyone else find the guys on underwear really hot? when i get new underwear, i kinda can’t help but stare at it for a bit until i remember that i’m in public and people could notice that i’m staring. also, i’ve recently fully accepted myself as gay and that’s really helped me mentally. for a few years i would beat myself up about it out of shame. anyways, i was just curious about when and how you found out you were gay?

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[–] UraniumBlazer@lemm.ee 5 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

It's weird, but I think I always knew. So we didn't have sex Ed in school (I lived in a very conservative country). My parents also didn't have "the talk" with me ever. This is why I got to know about what sex was somewhere around the age of 11-12.

Now, I was masturbating n stuff WAAAAAAAY before this. And I knew what fantasies I had when masturbating lmao. They very clearly were boys from school.

Anyway, so after I got to know what sex actually meant (kinda), I quickly discovered porn, when I tried looking for a sex demonstration or something (I initially thought that u had to go to the hospital to perform this "sex procedure" in front of the doctors to make a baby or whatever). Anyway, so I discovered straight porn. At the same time, people at school had started using the slur, "gay".

I knew it meant man+man instead of woman+man. I looked it up, and immediately understood that I was indeed gay.

Now ofc, acceptance took almost my entire teenage life. I hated myself for being who I was and so on. Wasn't very nice.

[–] yoshisaur@lemm.ee 2 points 4 weeks ago

i grew up in a conservative state (Oklahoma) and in the church, so i was told being gay was one of the worst sins. i also never got the talk. i ended up learning what sex was from one of my friends when i was 12. it hurts a lot being in a state where a ton of people are against you and some hate you so much that they are willing to kill you