this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2024
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Late Stage Capitalism
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"I love this person so much I want to get the government involved."
I seriously don't get what people see in getting married.
Over 15 years married here. Companionship, support, shared resources, the naughty stuff, the security of those shared promises to each other. The only downside is that you can't just live for yourself any more, everything has to be negotiated, but that doesn't mean you can't negotiate areas of freedom.
Of course it's not for everyone, some feel they can achieve all the above by mutual agreement without involving any certificates or vows. Maybe for some reason they prefer a situation either of them can just walk away from.
OPs' problem is not marriage, it's the USA's completely fucked-up health system.
You can have all those things without marriage, though.
In reality it's about government benefits. It makes being in a long-term relationship logistically easier.
But none of that has to do with marriage, that's long term commitment.
I have all that without marriage. And you can walk away from a marriage any day of the week.
In the US: Emergency medical decisions/advanced directives, hospital visitation, postmortem decisions, much easier management of estate. There are lots more legal benefits, but that's a pretty big start.
Too few people have advanced directives. If you ever deal with a medical emergency or life-critical event, having these in place makes things a lot easier to manage. Marriage or affidavit of civil partnership is a shortcut for those things.
There's over a thousand legal benefits iirc. Things like being able to visit while in the hospital. It's ridiculous but it's not like there's no reason
During visiting hours, yeah, anyone can. I'm guessing you weren't allowed to stay overnight without permission or someone looking the other way
only way my partner and I can live in the same country
Unfortunately, I had the flip side of this post, we were engaged to get married eventually if we ever got around to it/cared to. Flash forward 8 months and a medical emergency either woulda bankrupted her/both of us, or we get married and we can live with the deductible with her on my insurance.
Would've liked to avoid the paperwork, but life can be crazy like that sometimes.
Or maybe the place that has those awful requirements is the problem.... ?