this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2024
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Chronic Illness
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Not only am I in pain, I'm also feeling guilty about it and the fact that I'm resting so much. I really try not to, but it's almost impossible.
Mornings are the worst for me and I still feel half dead even after 10 hours of sleep (or more). I need about one or two hours to even be half awake. It's hard to open my eyes at first, let alone move. So I begin my day at noon and end it at 5pm or so. And I need breaks too, can't skip those.
This also limits my ability to get better, as I often don't have the energy to go to all of my doctors appointments. I force myself to go for a walk and do the exercises for my back, but everything where I have to leave the house for more than 30 minutes is difficult and often impossible.
For me, the worst part is, that I can't sit. I can do it 5 to 10 minutes and then the pain ramps up. You can't do shit without sitting.