this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2024
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Yeah I've never understood if they expect me to just eat the tail, or start playing with my pasta with my hands to pull them off. Certainly not gonna waste like half my shrimp by just cutting the meat where the tail starts.
Assert dominance by eating as per normal and when you encounter a tail, spit it at the chef.
Am I eating in the restaurant kitchen or walking back there each time I bite a tail?
I like each time for extra awkwardness
Oh trust me, I don't need the extra awkwardness!
Chef: (Still holding towel after wiping 13 shrimp tail shells off his face) Back again?!
Me: (Awkwardly hovering in the doorway) Yeah sorry, I was going back and forth on this but I found a shell piece all by itself with no shrimp in it and while I have no reason to put it in my mouth I figured I needed to show conviction to impress my date so... PATOOIE
Save them all in your cheeks then blast them at the chef like Yoshi