this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2024
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[–] booly@sh.itjust.works 25 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Most men have experienced the stifling gender norms that force them into a box: they're not allowed to cry or show any feeling other than anger, there's no such thing as non-sexual touch or romance, women don't like sex so trying to get close to them is inherently rapey and goes against their desires.

Feminism fights against that trap, that men are only men if they check certain boxes. That's what's toxic: telling men they're not allowed to be certain ways.

So yeah, feminism does have a lot to offer men. Toxic societal expectations are bad for everyone.

[–] CoggyMcFee@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Totally agree. Even back in the 70s, the wonderful feminist movie/record Free To Be You and Me (with songs like “It’s All Right to Cry” sung by an NFL player) was at least as much about men not being defined a certain way as it was about women.

I think one hurdle for men right off the bat is the fact that it’s called “feminism”. That makes it clear that it has something to offer women, but doesn’t make it obvious that it has something to offer men too, so they don’t give it an open mind.

(I’m not actually saying that I think the name should change, and in fact the movement could potentially drift away from its core mission over time if the name didn’t have women as the focus. Just saying it’s a hurdle.)

[–] laserm@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

This; we are often in a desperate state if mind, suffocated by pressure and expectation. While the pain made me be more liberal and have more empathy for other people, the desperation can also drive people to listen to anyone who is offering them a solution. In this lies the problem; the 'alpha male' crooks are trying to sell them a lifestyle that they think will make them happy. They are offering them solution, though one that doesn't help them. TERFS and the "kill all men" feminists don't help either, they just fuel the hate, overshadowing even helpful feminists and in general activists that are trying to provide ACTUAL solution.

I think we could greatly improve society if majority of people started to treat people based on who they are, instead of what their genitals are. And sorry for bad English.