this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2024
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me_irl
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You're a social primate with social anxiety?
but i'm not anxious, just irritated
What's the difference? I'm really asking.
Anxiety is stressing about interactions and how they'll go. Worrying that you'll upset someone or say something wrong, or just even not knowing what to say next in a conversation. Thinking that people will make fun of you or hate you for who you are. Potentially even avoiding such interactions to "prevent" these manufactured possibilities.
Irritation is more like "Holy shit this dude has been rambling about inane bullshit I don't care about for the last 30 minutes and isn't getting the hints I want him to stop and go away. Please just shut the fuck up already so I can go back to focusing on what I was doing"
It really depends on both sides of the interaction and what's happening with the individuals.
I've seen ppl tolerate some very annoying situations and manage it quite successfully and don't let it annoy them .
Then There are people out there that monopolize conversations. That in itself could be a form of narcissism and lack of consideration. Conversely: your own Irritation could also be because you just want your interests discussed or want to be the topic and can't tolerate things that aren't about showcasing to you or about you. This again could just be more narcissism than legitimate irritation. a battle of egos even.
Or it could be you're tired. Or hangry. Or burnt out.
The difference is when you realize a rational reaction to someone and if you can let shit go and not let it annoy you so much. Also if sleeping or eating something and you forget why you hated that person so much.
It's worth stepping back and asking yourself why you let this petty shit get to you though. Others are gonna be who they be with or without your approval.
For me personally, I just am and always have been a really big introvert, and my social battery drains very quickly if I'm stuck in a social situation I'm not interested in because of it. If I start giving you signs that I'm tired of talking or that I was trying to focus on something important that you're distracting me from, and you still keep going anyways, then I start getting irritated.
If I was better at politely but firmly telling people to leave me the hell alone when that battery drains it probably wouldn't be as much of an issue, but I also don't know how to do that without feeling rude.
Leaving you “the hell alone” right there, tells me you are not speaking as an introvert. You might have introvert traits but that doesn’t speak on what it is to be introverted alone.
You sound like youre emotional all about it. angry enough to get upset. This seems more anxious. Introverts don’t have issues socializing and they don’t see it as a chore where they get fed up. They recognize that they need to take a break, they take one. They don’t lack empathy or acknowledging other people in a situation just to concentrate on run away feelings. It’s easy to extract when you’re not upset. You got something else going on.