Dog Lemmy

Hello, fellow dogs. I need some advice. Every time I play fetch with my human, they keep trying to take the b*ll from me. This is causing me a lot of stress, because I want them to throw the ball for me, not take it away. Sometimes, I'll run away with the b*ll to keep them from taking it, but then they won't throw it. I mean, what's with that behavior? It's so frustrating, and it happens every time we play. I didn't ask, but the c*t said I'm in the wrong here. What do you guys think?

I'm a little worried about my human. Like the title says, they'll only throw the b*ll for me for about three hours (throwing is such a neat trick, btw, I love that about them). After that, they'll usually just, like, stop throwing it or even put the b*ll away. It just seems like such a small amount of fetch, it's got me worried; is there something wrong with my human?

As long as I've lived in my house, random humans keep coming up and leaving boxes by the front door. I've tried to tell my human that they need to go yell at them or it's going to keep happening, but they never do and, surprise surprise, it keeps happening. In fact, it seems like it's only getting worse. I've tried taking matters into my own paws by barking at them through the window, but they don't seem to care (like, wtf???). I don't know what to do at this point, I feel like I'm at the end of my leash.

Every time I get in the trash, my human finds me, tells me to leave it, and puts the trash back in the garbage can. It's really bizarre, I don't understand why they insist on throwing all this stuff out that they can just have for a little snack. Can someone explain this behavior?