this post was submitted on 19 Jun 2024
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“Are There Other Fairies Like The Tooth Fairy That Pay Money For Human Body Parts?” Asks Child to Shocked Mom (lemmy.world)
submitted 5 months ago by tattletaletimes@lemmy.world to c/theonion@midwest.social
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6-year-old Mark Buffet has posed a question that has left his mother, Nancy Buffet, both bewildered and concerned: “Mom, are there any other fairies like the Tooth Fairy that pay money for human body parts?”

The question reportedly arose yesterday morning after Mark found $5 under his pillow in exchange for his latest lost tooth, sparking an entrepreneurial curiosity about the potential fortune he could make if something like the appendix fairy exists.

Read the rest of the satire news article here on TattletaleTimes.com

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[–] lugal@lemmy.ml 42 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I wouldn't call them fairies but who am I to judge

[–] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 29 points 5 months ago (2 children)

maybe the Appendix Goblin instead of Appendix Fairy? 😀

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 15 points 5 months ago

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[–] thesporkeffect@lemmy.world 15 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I have personally met the Ass Goblin so there's probably one for the appendix, too

[–] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 18 points 5 months ago

I have a feeling if I googled this I'd get a lot of results from Deviant Art

[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

I have personally met the Ass Goblin

Ok Hollywood

[–] jrwperformance@lemmy.world 33 points 5 months ago

There's the finger-nail fairy and the random body-hair fairy. But they don't leave money under the pillow, they leave change in the couch cushions.

[–] Lmaydev@programming.dev 33 points 5 months ago

Tooth fairies are the nicest species in the bone fairy group

[–] GreatTitEnthusiast@mander.xyz 18 points 5 months ago (1 children)

There aren't other fairies but you should keep a little dirt under your pillow for the Dirt Man

[–] Notthemama@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

Otherwise known as the night man, aaaAAAAHHH.

[–] merari42@lemmy.world 18 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Hey, the kidney fairy gives you a bath tub full of ice for your kidneys

[–] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

somewhat uneven trade but not all trades can be fair

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 4 points 5 months ago

That's why trade negotiations and global alliances are so important.

[–] waigl@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I think those fairies are called "black market organ dealers".

[–] Notthemama@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago

They are probably still flying!🤣

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 12 points 5 months ago

Ok, see, here's an actual real reason I would go back in time for. So I could ask this.

[–] tpihkal@lemmy.world 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

$5‽

[–] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 23 points 5 months ago

Inflation! Unlike the company I work for, the tooth fairy accounts for inflation with their payouts

[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago

Perineum Fairy: Why yes, Timmy. Yes there are.

[–] VelvetStorm@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Another great article! These light-hearted reads help my mood every time I read them.

[–] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 7 points 5 months ago

thank you so much!