Asklemmy
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
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It federates with the servers that have some stuff I want access to on them, and it also has rules against being a huge douche. And it's supported by Jerboa.
That's pretty much it. Mix of convenience and what passes for my moral scruples.
Lemmy user for a couple of days here. I jumped on lemmy.world because it was big and the name suggested it was universal and open, it had open registration and allows nsfw content.
I suffered through the technical issues many of us experienced, but everything seems much better and smoother now (maybe because they were able to fix the issues, or maybe because enough people left because of them, I can't say!)
Does it matter what you use? Yes and no, I guess. Apparently the last few days performance issues were mostly local to dot-world. I did make another profile on lemm.ee and I noticed the different instances seem to show different feeds with some different content, but also many of the same posts from the same communities as well. I'm still trying to figure out how they decide what they show in their feeds. Something to do with federation, I guess, but I'm not pretending to understand the meaning of that concept yet. Given that instances can choose to federated or defederate, it seems like it must matter to some extent what instance you are on even though content can be shared between instances.
IDK
I chose mine because it disallows NSFW on its own communities and takes a hard stance against defederation while not being defederated. I want to have more control over my feed and not be isolated.
I went with ReddThat as the past tense seemed apt. Also it's a small enough instance not to feel overwhelming, while being large enough to provide content.
I went for what I believe to be the bigger one, because it might get a higher quality of support from third parties, and still be here after a year.