this post was submitted on 29 Jul 2024
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Relationship Advice
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When I find myself saying “I” a lot in my explanations of the situation to someone else, I usually realize that whatever anxieties or hesitations I am experiencing are coming from within. What I mean by that is that it’s usually something of greater personal context than the (potential) relationship with the person I’m interested in. You go into that a little bit with your explanations of your experience and time since your last romance. Dig deeper into what is making you feel the way you’re feeling. It might turn out that he has nothing to do with it!
Other than that, I would say continue to see him. It sounds like enough of you is interested in him that it’s worth further pursuing. Your concerns of leading him on just show you care for his feelings. That’s a good sign imo. It’s okay to carry on when you’re unsure, as long as you maintain awareness of his perspective. If you do, you’ll better know the moment you’d really have to make a decision.
Forgive me for making assumptions about you, but your writing reads to me like someone with enough self-awareness to worry themselves into a box. Channel that self-awareness into self-reflection, trust your gut and your self, and I think you’ll be just fine. Regardless of whether it works out with this guy or not in the end. Rooting for ya!
I don't often worry about anything, but I do when it comes to relationships, I just never seem to know what is the cause of my feelings. I have been trying to trust my gut as you have said and that's why I continued to date him, because I do like him and I have felt like I wanted to go on dates and kiss, etc. What I found interesting and why I made this post is that my gut stopped me from going any further than making out with him. But could be due to all the aforementioned anxiety about the situation itself. Thank you for your comments!
Apologies then, bit of projection on my behalf, admittedly. That’s the crux of this format — I have neither enough context nor insight to your experiences to really give specific enough advice. All I can say with certainty is that your body is telling you something. It’s important to get to the reason (not that you’re not trying to, of course). That process looks different for everyone. Though it doesn’t work for me, writing in some form helps a lot of people gather their thoughts. Long walks are another one that works for people. You’re welcome for the comments, I hope you find clarity soon!